Libs Get their Pumpkin Spice Fix

It's that time of year again, when liberals line up for their beloved Pumpkin Spice Latte at Starbucks. The coffee giant has brought back its fall menu, including the infamous PSL, much to the delight of the soy-latte-sipping left.

Since its debut in 2003, the Pumpkin Spice Latte continues to be Starbucks' most popular seasonal beverage, beloved by customers worldwide.

Starting Thursday, August 22, these snowflakes can get their PSL fix, along with a new icy, nondairy, chai-flavored concoction, the "Iced Apple Crisp Nondairy Cream Chai." God help us.

But that's not all, folks! Starbucks is also rolling out new drinkware in "vibrant autumn hues," because nothing says "MAGA" like a $30 purple water bottle.

Here's the lowdown on the rest of the menu:

• Pumpkin Cream Cold Brew: Liberal tears not included.
• Iced Pumpkin Cream Chai: Because one overpriced chai latte isn't enough.
• Iced Apple Crisp Nondairy Cream Chai: Save a goat, drink oat.
• Apple Crisp Oatmilk Macchiato: Apple-cinnamon craziness.
• Iced Apple Crisp Oatmilk Shaken Espresso: Shake it like a liberal.
• Raccoon Cake Pop: 'Cause nothing says 'Murica like eating trash pandas.
• Pumpkin Cream Cheese Muffin: For when you want your muffin to taste like pumpkin pie.
• Baked Apple Croissant and Pumpkin & Pepita Loaf: Because one baked good isn't enough.

So, there you have it, folks. While we're loading our guns and stockpiling ammo for the upcoming Liberal Snowpocalypse, they're stocking up on Pumpkin Spice. God bless 'em.