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Vote Red, or You're Dead!

You better get off your lazy, liberal butt and vote GOP—or what? You want a bunch of crybaby lefties running the show? We're talking about people who think men can get pregnant and that giving guns to toddlers is dangerous. They're coming for your freedom and your guns! Want baby-killers and perverts teaching your kids? You know what to do. Save America. Vote Red.

Published June 24, 2024 at 5:55am by


Want to End Democracy and Hijack the Nation? Vote Republican!

  • Authoritarian rule and goodbye democracy
  • Screw the Paris Climate Agreement, fossil fuels forever!
  • Tax cuts for the rich, screw the deficit
  • Replace scientists with GOP at the EPA, why not?
  • Hope Russia wins in Ukraine, NATO and WHO are so yesterday
  • Abortion? Incest, rape, health risks? No exceptions!
  • Defund the CDC, who needs 'em?
  • Privatize education, your taxes will pay
  • Obamacare, gone!
  • Chaos, our middle name

Believe these conspiracy theories? GOP is your party:

  • Climate change, fake news!
  • 2020 election, stolen!
  • Obama, Kenyan!
  • Sandy Hook, staged!

Otherwise, you snowflake libs, vote Dem.

Don Hammond, Austin

Ten Commandments in Classrooms: Saving us from 'Moral Decay'?

So, God has been kicked out of classrooms for over 60 years, and now we have 'moral decay'. Even if you don't believe in God, let's bring the Ten Commandments back and brainwash- I mean, teach our kids some morals. It's our only hope to save this 'lost' nation.

Act now, or there won't be a republic left to save. Teach those kids the 'morals' this nation was founded on, and kudos to Louisiana for making the Ten Commandments compulsory.

Newt Hasson, Austin

Gov. Abbott's Scheme: Tax Money for Private Schools = Taxation without Representation

Gov. Greg Abbott wants to expand govt. control with his educational savings accounts scheme. It'll cost money to admin and opens the door to fraud. Giving tax dollars to private schools = taxation without representation. Unelected officials, free from public school constraints = no thanks!

Legislators, stick to your oath and improve our public education system first.

Tricia Kim, Austin

Light Rail for Austin: Undoing the Underminers

Austin voters wanna ditch their cars and get on track with light rail. Opponents, why you hatin'? IH-35 is a parking lot, and tailpipe pollution is killing our air quality. Light rail reduces traffic, boosts bikes/walking, connects bus routes, and might even get us affordable housing.

EPA says transport is the biggest polluter, and greenhouse gas emissions are frying the planet. So, sue-happy folks, stop blocking progress and let us improve our quality of life!

Kalpana Sutaria, Citizens’ Climate Lobby, Austin Chapter

Supreme Court: The Worst in History (Almost)

So, the Supreme Court, with 3 exceptions, is the worst. Ever. Thanks to them, Roe v. Wade is history, and now bump stocks are back.

Life appointments are dumb. If the people voted, we'd have sane justices who care about the law. Rest in peace, Ruth Bader Ginsburg and other legal greats, you must be rolling in your graves.

Bess Mitchell, Austin

Reproductive Rights: Speak Up or Forever Hold Your Choice

The Supreme Court preserved abortion access, but anti-abortion groups won't stop. They want to impose their religious beliefs on everyone, using outdated laws to restrict not just abortion but also LGBTQIA+ rights.

We must support orgs fighting for our rights and speak up to protect our freedom to choose what happens to our bodies, based on our beliefs.

Leland Murphy, Austin

The GOP's Civil War: 'Eat Your Own' Strategy

Hey GOP, here's what you're missing: Your leaders are chasing policies most Texans don't want. Gov. Abbott is pushing school vouchers while underfunding public schools, especially in rural areas. AG Paxton and Trump are endorsing opponents of fellow Republicans who dared to vote against them.

It's a 'loyalty test' strategy that defies explanation, and convicted felon Trump is at the center. What's going on, folks?

Craig Hackler, Austin

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