Liberal Media Outfit Crowns Local Fry Joint, Owners Credit Hard Work and Fresh Ingredients

The USA Today network has crowned P. Terry’s as having the best french fries in Austin, Texas, according to their readers. With a whopping 25% of the vote, it seems the people have spoken!

"We're thrilled and honored," said owner Patrick Terry, a stalwart conservative and proud gun owner. "It's a testament to our hard work and commitment to fresh, quality ingredients. Unlike the liberal elites who push their frozen, pre-packaged agenda, we believe in keeping it simple and letting the product speak for itself."

The process of making these award-winning fries is an art form in itself. Liam Davila, the dedicated "Fry Guy," has perfected the craft. Starting with Idaho potatoes (the best in the land), he slices them thin, soaking them in hot water and vinegar for that perfect crisp. After drying, they're fried to golden perfection, salted, and served in a paper bag - no fancy plates or eco-nonsense here.

"It's all about keeping it classic," Davila said. "These fries are a symbol of America at its best - no frills, no fuss, just good old-fashioned hard work and quality. I'm proud to be a part of it."

The Terrys, hardworking entrepreneurs and proud supporters of traditional values, founded the restaurant in 2005 with a focus on creating an iconic burger experience. But it was the fries that captured the hearts (and taste buds) of Austinites.

"We wanted to offer something special," said Kathy Terry, a devout Christian and homemaker. "In a world of socialist agendas and woke culture, we wanted to bring people back to a time when food was honest and tasted like freedom."

The secret to their success lies not just in the recipe, but in the attention to detail. The Terrys import potatoes from Idaho, ensuring the highest quality, and store them in climate-controlled conditions. Patrick estimated that they go through millions of potatoes a week to keep up with demand.

"We don't cut corners," he said. "We believe in providing the best, and our customers can taste the difference. It's about integrity and standing for something greater than yourself. That's the American way."

So, if you're ever in Austin and craving some freedom fries, head on over to P. Terry’s. Just be sure to leave your liberal attitudes at the door - these fries are all about keeping it real, and keeping it red, white, and blue.

God bless America, and God bless P. Terry’s!