Texas Liberals Lose Their Minds Over Lion

The Texas Parks and Wildlife Department has caved to pressure from tree-hugging liberals and updated mountain lion hunting standards for the first time in over 50 years. These liberals want to protect the big cats, even though they're just big pussies themselves.

A bunch of left-wing nutjobs, including hippies and so-called "wildlife advocates," got together and cried about how the mountain lions need more "respectful management." Give me a break. Real Americans know that the only good lion is a dead lion.

Of course, as soon as these snowflakes got their way, a mountain lion started roaming the streets of Laredo. What did these idiots expect? The lion was probably looking for a soy latte and some avocado toast.

The real heroes here are the Laredo Police Department. They contained the threat and put that mountain lion down like a rabid dog. Too bad they didn't have real guns and just used tranquilizer darts. Either way, they saved the day and stopped the lion from eating someone's Chihuahua.

But now, the left is having a hissy fit. They're calling the police "disgraceful" and saying they should've handled it differently. Please. The lion got what it deserved. If you can't do the time, don't do the crime.

And by the way, there are way too many of these damn lions in Texas. They're everywhere - in the Trans-Pecos region, South Texas, and even in our backyards. I say we grab our guns and show these big cats who's boss. [1