UnAustralian Survives Shark Attack, Lives to Surf Another Day

An Aussie bloke, Kai McKenzie, had a brush with death after a run-in with a shark while surfing. This city slicker lost his right leg in the attack but considers himself "lucky."

"He saw the shark approach and was a real mate, fought it off, but still lost a leg. A small price to pay for being a larrikin and swimming with the deadly marine creature," said a GoFundMe page set up by his mates.

Of course, this greenie is already planning to get back in the water, stating on his Instagram:

"I’ll be back in that water in no time!"

Despite his close shave with death, McKenzie is all smiles, posing with what's left of his leg, showing the true Aussie spirit of "she'll be right, mate." This battler has even received a decent chunk of change from the GoFundMe page, raising AUD $173,852 out of the AUD $250,000 target. Good on ya, Kai!

What Happened?

Well, Kai was doing the typical Aussie thing and surfing on July 23 when he spotted a massive shark heading his way. He didn't throw another shrimp on the barbie; he fought it off like a true Crocodile Dundee.

Officials confirmed it was a 10-foot-long great white shark, as reported by the BBC (Bloody BBC, always butting in). A fair dinkum bloke, a retired copper, used his dog's leash as a tourniquet to stop the bleeding before McKenzie was taken to the hospital. And he lived to tell the tale, even giving a shoutout to his missus on the 'Gram:

"To be here right now just to be able to hold my beautiful Eve and my family is everything to me," he said.

Why Do Sharks Bite People?

Well, these marines biologists will tell ya it's because sharks are "sociable" and "curious." Smithsonian Magazine and National Geographic might call them "intelligent, highly inquisitive creatures," but I say they're just looking for their next meal.

How Often Do Shark Attacks Happen?

According to the Florida Museum of Natural History, there were only 15 shark attacks in Australia in 2023, with only four of those being fatal.

What are the Odds?

More people need rescuing from a rip current than being bitten by a shark. In fact, from 2004 to 2013, there were 341,294 rip current rescues compared to only 379 shark attacks. So, you're more likely to get struck by lightning than eaten by a shark.

So, next time you're out surfing, remember: sharks aren't that interested in taking a bite out of you. But if they do, well, you might just end up like Kai here, a legend who lived to tell the tale.