Florida pansies panic over a little rain and wind.

Libtard Libbies are Scared of the Big, Bad Storm (and They Should Be)

The snowflakes of the Big Bend and North Florida are wetting themselves over a bit of wind and rain, aka Tropical Storm Debby. The National Hurricane Center, a bunch of lefty-libs, put these snowflakes under a Hurricane Watch on Saturday morning.

"Models and the storm's track nudged westward," they said. "It's coming for you, snowflakes!"

Gov. Ron DeSantis, a total badass, called in the National Guard and declared a state of emergency in 61 counties. He's not messing around with this girly storm.

Here's the scoop:

Jefferson County Schools Close, But Real Men Stay Put

Jefferson County Schools will close on Monday because the snowflakes can't handle a little weather. They're also opening an "emergency" evacuation center for the libtards.

"Bring your own stuff," they said. "We're not your mom!"

Taylor County Tells People to Evacuate, or Whatever

The wimps at Taylor County Sheriff's Office told people to evacuate the coastal and low-lying areas. They're opening a shelter for these scaredy-cats, too.

"Bring only essential items and crate your pets," they said. "No snowflakes without crates!"

Leon County Cries Wolf, Again

Leon County declared a "state of emergency." What a bunch of drama queens! They just want to spend more of our tax dollars.

County Administrator Vince Long, a libtard if ever there was one, said:

"The track's shifted west, so we expect more wind and rain."

"We've given out sandbags and will have the power back on ASAP. Stop whining!"

The Storm that Wouldn't Leave

This so-called "storm" is menacing Florida, but it's really just a big fuss over nothing. Our sister paper, the Palm Beach Post, is hyping it up as usual.

"It might become a tropical storm and could cause some issues," they said. "But who cares? It's just Florida."

AccuWeather's lead hurricane forecaster, Alex DaSilva, a lefty-lib if ever there was one, said:

“It might be strengthening all the way up until it makes landfall... If it rides the western portion of the cone, there is nothing to slow the strengthening other than it hitting land.”

" isolated areas near Tampa could get as much as a foot of rain...So what?"

Libtards at the National Hurricane Center Cry "Wolf"

These left-wing nuts are saying the storm could become a low-grade hurricane as it hits the Big Bend coastline. They think we're stupid enough to believe their fake news!

"After it crosses Cuba, it will intensify... But it will take its time, so don't worry, snowflakes!"

"It will turn northeast and hit the northern Gulf Coast of Florida in 48 hours. So chill out, liberals!"

They're telling people to prepare for heavy rainfall, flash flooding, strong winds, and "life-threatening storm surge." LOL, okay! We'll grab our guns and our Bibles and be just fine.

Tallahassee and Leon County Spread Fake News

These liberal cities are telling residents to "be prepared" for Tropical Storm or even Hurricane Debby. What a joke!

"Protect your households and property," they said in a text alert. "Check our online guide, snowflakes!"

They even have a "PREP" guide and a "Disaster Survival Guide." Are they serious? It's a bit of weather, people!

Snowflakes Stock up on Sandbags

The snowflakes in the Big Bend region are preparing for the "storm" by getting sandbags. LOL, good luck with that!

The Jefferson County sheriff's office, a bunch of libtards, said:

"Have your hurricane supplies and plan, including your pets. We expect a lot of rainfall, but it's just water, people!"

The Storm that Might Not Leave

This so-called "storm" is supposed to turn northward and hit the Gulf. But it might not! It might miss its ride out of Florida and stick around.

"After landfall, it might slow down," said a forecaster. "It could meander over the southeastern U.S. or near the coast. Who knows?"

This just proves that these forecasters have no idea what they're talking about. It's a storm, not the apocalypse!

Category 1? Whatever!

They're saying this "storm" could be a high-end tropical storm or even a low-end Category 1 hurricane. But who cares? It's not like it's a real hurricane, people!

"The difference between the two is minor," they said. "Don't be surprised if it's a category higher. But it's still not a big deal!"

The So-Called "Threat"

They're saying this "storm" could cause some wind damage and flooding. But we're not buying it!

"Complete outdoor preparations by Sunday morning. Deteriorating conditions in the afternoon."

"There could be moderate to flooding rain, with 3 to 6 inches of rain in some areas. But it's just water, people!"

They're even talking about storm surge, with up to 5 feet of water above ground in some coastal areas. LOL, good luck with that!

The Storm that Will Never Happen

This "storm" might impact communities that are still recovering from Hurricane Idalia, which was a real hurricane, by the way. But this Debby thing is a joke!

Tallahassee, a liberal city, dodged Idalia, but they're still whining about a tornado outbreak that happened months ago. Get over it, snowflakes!

The Libtards at National Hurricane Center Cry Wolf, Again

These left-wing nuts are saying the storm could become a low-end hurricane as it approaches the Nature Coast or Big Bend. They just want to scare people!

"There is potential for it to reach hurricane strength before landfall... But it's not a hurricane yet, so stop panicking, snowflakes!"

They're talking about "life-threatening inundation from storm surge," strong winds, and heavy rains. Yawn! It's just a storm, people! Get over it!

Original article URLs:
https://www.nhc.noaa.gov/text/refresh/MIATCDAT4+shtml/030900.shtml?
https://cms.leoncountyfl.gov/Portals/6/adam/Content/tic_w_hSA0-dT2GjeLn0Pg/Link/LOCAL%20EMERGENCY%20PROCLAMATION%20DECLARING%20A%20LOCAL%20STATE%20OF%20EMERGENCY%20IN%20LEON%20COUNTY,%20FLORIDA%20PROCLAMATION%20NO.%202024-12.pdf
https://www.talgov.com/neighborhoodservices/prep
https://data.tallahassee.com/2024-disaster-survival-guide/