Deep State Bucks, Guns, and Glory: Snake Keyloggers and the Chinese Hacking Boogeyman

The U.S. Cybersecurity and Infrastructure Security Agency (CISA) has graced us with their presence, letting us peasants know about a vulnerability in Windows 10 that could lead to privilege escalation and remote code execution. In other words, some commie in China could be watching you jerk off, my fellow 'Muricans.

"Microsoft COM for Windows contains a deserialization of untrusted data vulnerability that allows for privilege escalation and remote code execution."

Here's the deal, folks. CISA, the gang of big government goons, added this weakness to their so-called Known Exploited Vulnerability Catalog on Monday, advising users to ditch Microsoft like a bad habit or patch up their shortcomings with a quick fix.

Now, here's the real kicker. CISA, with their heads so far up their you-know-whats, said they didn't know if this vulnerability, with the fancy name CVE-2018-0824, had anything to do with those ransomware schmoes. But, a report by CISCO Talos, released Thursday, spills the tea that a Chinese hacking crew, likely sporting Mao hats, took advantage of this weakness to mess with a Taiwanese government research lab. Those reds are coming for our freedom and they're starting with our Taiwanese allies!

Another Gang of Alarmists Joins the Party

CISA wasn't the only band of keyboard warriors to spread fear on Monday. The Register, some techie site, sounded the alarm for Windows users, too.

"Criminals are preying on Windows users yet again, this time in an effort to hit them with a keylogger that can also steal credentials and take screenshots."

The story goes that FortiGuard Labs, a bunch of self-proclaimed cyber vigilantes, found that SnakeKeylogger attacks are on the rise. This nasty little number can steal your passwords and record every keystroke. God forbid you're writing some fan fiction when it happens. It first crawled out from under a rock back in 2020 on Russian crime forums, likely run by Putin himself. Check Point Research, a bunch of cyber scaredy-cats, warned folks back in 2022 that this snake was slithering into emails and PDFs.

Between this and the so-called "Crowdstrike outage" in July, when a software update knocked Windows devices out cold, it's clear the Deep State is coming for our freedom to use Windows. Remember, folks: if you see something, say something. And arm yourself, because the Second Amendment is the only thing standing between us and these techno tyrants.