Blue-state snowflakes: Texas heatwave won't make you melt, Libs!

Texas Heat Wave: When Cracking Your Skull (I Mean Garage) Is a Cool Idea

Those damn liberals are at it again, trying to control your life and your wallet. This time, they want to stick their noses into your business and tell you how to beat the Texas heat. Well, I've got a few ideas on how to deal with those nosy leftists and the hot weather...

Crack a Cold One and Your Garage Door Too

Texans are tough, but even we can't ignore the scorching heat. So, some folks came up with a nifty idea: leave your garage door slightly open. Why? Well, those few inches of fresh air can cool down your garage, and voila, your house feels like a winter wonderland in no time. OK, maybe not that extreme, but you get the point.

But does it work? Well, the experts chime in:

"Cracking the door will indeed benefit and alleviate the heat. But a well-maintained, properly insulated garage is key."

So, there you have it, folks. A little crack never hurt anybody, am I right? Just be aware, while you're venting that hot air, some burglar might also "vent" your prized possessions, and those critters might join your family for tea...

Tips to Keep Your Cool, and I Don't Mean Joe Biden

Now, if you're still worried about the heat, and those damn electricity bills, here are some quick fixes:

1. Change that damn air filter already!
2. Clean the vents, lazy bones!
3. Keep the outside unit clear, duh.
4. Drain and coils? Clean them too!
5. Get a professional, only if they're not a woke liberal snowflake.

Texans: Tough, Smart, and Prefer 78 Degrees

A recent poll showed most Texans are badasses, setting their AC at 78 degrees. The Department of Energy agrees; they say it's the best temp for your wallet and your comfort. So, there you have it, folks, another reason why we're the greatest state in the Union. Source: American-Statesman poll