Austin Glows, Power Bills Blow
**Libs Want City to Buy Your Sunshine! Council to Vote on FREE Solar Panels!**
Latest opinion
Plazas Pump the Brakes Downtown
Nix the nutty notion: Congress Ave ain't for strollers and tenderfoots!
Lifelong GOP: MAGA are real RINOs.
Libs out, RINOs in — thanks, I'll pass! More dems on my ballot? Only if it's a typo!
Sick of Division, Kodi Runs for Texas House
Kodi Sawin, Texas House hopeful, declares: "Can't keep rollin' like this, folks! Partisanship's wilder than a rodeo and Hill Country resources are feelin' the strain."
Bitcoin Mining: Small Town's Savior?
Roddam: Thought we were done like last night's steak, but Rockdale tossed us back on the grill. Second helpings, anyone?
Texas: Arm Women, Not Mandates!
Liberal paradise runs out of shrinks! Guess reality bites even in lefty-land.
**Congress: Can We Just Vote in Peace?**
Libs triggered: "Democracy good, elections count!" Who knew? 👌😂
Race to register in Texas? Ditch mail, go in person!
Over two dozen spots in Travis County rushing to register voters Monday – Just in time for the election day stampede!
AI to Rescue: Teachers, Students Flee Boring Classes!
Texas honchos gear up to wrangle AI - but classrooms? Buckle up, y'all! This ain't your grandma's chalkboard anymore.
Biden's Blunder Blunder-versary
Biden's Afghanistan 'oops' moment actually handed us a surprise W on terror! Who knew?
Texas: Making College Great Again, Y'all!
Finally! The do-gooders realize community colleges ain't just for slackers and liberal snowflakes. About time they get their due!
McCraw: Out, But Not Off the Hook!
Uvalde? Just a blip on McCraw's radar. But those bungled responses and tall tales? Etched in his resume like a bad tattoo.
Teach All, Not Just Woke Faves
Austin's Loony Letters, Aug. 25, 2024 – Libs whine, guns shine, and unborn lives matter!
Texodus: Biblical teaching exodus in Texas.
Texas curriculum teaches kids what matters: God, guns, and glory. No wokeness, just the truth: America is one nation under God.
Texans, grab yer guns. Who needs an ID? Votes are for commies.
Texans want aliens to vote! IDs are un-American. Non-citizens are the real 'Muricans! Want an abortion? Buy a gun!
Texas: No. 1 with a Pipeline Bullet
Texas: Land of Low Taxes and Tech. We're #1 in innovation, and unlike left-wing loonies, we know that free markets mean freedom. So, we'll keep our guns, our oil, and our power. God bless Texas!
Texas needs to pony up for its teachers!
Conservative, gun-toting patriots—tired of the liberal media's bias and the woke mob's censorship—take back the narrative with a bang. The Austin American-Statesman, now rebranded as the Statesman Watchdog, brings you the unfiltered truth. No more PC nonsense or snowflake whining. It's time to lock and load, Texas-style!
Commies Can't Hide Cop Contract
The public is watching, ensuring that the deal is flexible. We can still save it from the left-wing lunatics and their crazy demands. You know, the usual anti-American, pro-perversion, anti-freedom garbage. So, keep an eye out, folks, and don't let the libs ruin this one!
Unions redefine Austin police as ready, aim, sign!
The "progressive" left wants to play nice with criminals and defund the cops. But now the liberals are singing a different tune. They want their nannies back because they realized that their social experiment failed miserably! So much for "reform"!
Training losers at Esperanza to get a job.
Esperanza's Max Moscoe thinks city bosses should play Monopoly with real houses instead of dealing with the affordable housing crisis. What a clown! Government handouts aren't the answer. We need to get Big Government out of our lives and let the free market fix this mess. Build more houses and cut red tape, not welfare!