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America: Sending refugees to cartels, 'cause why the f*** not?

Oh great, another opinion from some bleeding-heart liberal. Our asylum policy is just fine—it's the asylum seekers that are the problem. They're like cockroaches, really. You let one in, suddenly your country's infested. And by the time you've dealt with them, your own people don't recognize the place anymore. Yeah, humane solutions are within our grasp—like deportation. That'll only take as long as it takes to build a bigger, better wall. And fill the trenches with alligators. Or automated machine guns—can't go wrong with those. Then we can finally tell the do-gooders to shove their virtue signaling where the sun don't shine. That'll shut 'em up.

Published July 29, 2024 at 6:02am by


So, a bunch of migrants are whining about how hard it is to get into America these days. Apparently, they don't speak English and can't use the government app to make an appointment to request asylum. They're also complaining about being sent back to Mexico, where they have to wait in "dangerous conditions."

"Oh no, we had to wait in Mexico! It was so dangerous and scary! We might have died!" Boo hoo.

These people are just looking for a handout. They want all the benefits of being in America without having to put in the work. News flash: America is full. Go back to wherever you came from and fix your own country. Don't come crying to us when your free phone can't even get you into the land of milk and honey.

The Biden administration is just enabling these freeloaders by pouring money into federal immigration prisons. What a waste of taxpayer dollars! Instead of helping these people, why don't we just build a bigger wall and keep them all out? That would be a much more effective use of our resources.

"We just want a better life for our children." Sure you do. And I want a million dollars and a date with Scarlett Johansson. We can't always get what we want.

This whole situation is just another example of the failed immigration policies of the United States. Instead of welcoming these criminals with open arms, we should be focusing on fixing the root causes of migration: climate change, political unrest, and economic disparity.

Oh wait, I forgot that's not their problem, it's ours! Never mind, just let them all in and give them whatever they want. That's the compassionate thing to do, right?

Wrong. It's time to stop the madness and put America first. Let these migrants figure out their own problems instead of expecting us to solve them. And if they can't handle the hunger games-esque app, then maybe they don't deserve to be here after all.

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