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Oh super, Another Fuckin' Storm from Beryl's Bumhole to Texas. Yeehaw!

Oh great, just what we needed! Another tropical tantrum spawned from the Lesser Antilles, because Beryl wasn't enough of a bitch already. Thanks a lot, Mother Nature, you sadistic shrew.

Published August 9, 2024 at 8:13am by Brandi D. Addison


Breaking Wind: New Disturbance, Same Old Crap

Oh boy, hold onto your fedoras, folks! The National Hurricane Center is panting over a new disturbance that might become something over the next week. Because why have calm weather when you can have chaos, right?

Since Hurricane Debby strutted her stuff, two tropical waves have popped up, and one's already petered out. What a tease.

Now, there's a new kid on the block, hanging out a few hundred miles west-southwest of the Cabo Verde Islands. Supposedly, it's gonna throw a party near the Lesser Antilles early next week. Don't you just love uninvited guests?

Wanna be a weather weenie? Sign up for text updates about this crapshoot.

Stalk the Storm

Will it be a tropical depression, a storm, or just a bunch of hot air? Who knows!

  • Chance of formation in 48 hours: Lol, nope. Near zero percent.
  • Chance of formation in 7 days: Eh, maybe. 50 percent.

Hurricane Tracker: See the Atlantic's Active Tantrums

Texas Weather: Warnings and Watches (Because Who Needs Peace of Mind?)

A warning means shit's gonna hit the fan somewhere in the warning zone.

A watch means crap might happen within the watch area. They'll give you a heads-up about 48 hours before tropical-storm-force winds roll in, so you can GTFO or batten down the hatches.

Wanna be a real weather worrier? Sign up for text alerts about severe weather, you masochist.

Read more: NHC tracking yet another tropical disturbance, where Beryl originated before path to Texas