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Trump Pushes School Choice, Plans to Indoctrinate Kiddos With Patriotic Propaganda.

Trumpy boy's dropped his 'Agenda47', a real doozy like the number of times he's declared bankruptcy. Promises, promises - this time for teachers and kids, cuz 'education.' LOL, good one Don! We all know you'd rather bang your related teacher than listen to one. This buffoon's got more plans than braincells. Like his spray tan, his ideas are superficial and offensive.

Published August 12, 2024 at 4:30am by Kinsey Crowley


So, the Dems want to put a teacher in the White House. F*cking brilliant. What could go wrong? Let's just hope he doesn't try to educate the masses with his lesson plan of progressive bulls*t and social justice warrior activism. But hey, at least he's not Trump.

Speaking of Trump, he's got some plans up his orange sleeve for education. In his Agenda47, he lays out some ideas that might just make you facepalm harder than a Zoom call with your ex. From getting rid of teacher tenure to creating a patriotic teaching credentialing body, this guy wants to shake up the education system like a middle school science project.

But don't worry, the National Education Association is here to save the day! They've thrown their support behind Kamala Harris and her teacher BFF, Walz. NEA President Becky Pringle wants an administration that will kiss teachers' asses and give them all the resources and respect they deserve. But let's be real, we all know it's just another union power grab.

"When I started teaching many years ago...I didn't really have a clue every decision that was made about my kids, my classroom, my colleagues, was made by someone who was elected or appointed to some position of power," Pringle said, whining about how she wants more educators in power.

Yeah, yeah, we get it. You want your little teacher gang to rule the roost. God forbid anyone who isn't a "qualified educator" have an opinion on education.

But let's take a look at Trump's plans that will surely trigger every liberal teacher and union crony:

Tim Walz's Timeline: From Teaching Losers to VP Wannabe

  • Screw Teacher Tenure: Trump wants to give funding and high-fives to districts that tell teacher tenure to f*ck off. He's also about that Merit Pay life, rewarding teachers who actually give a s*t instead of coasting by on their unions' protection.

  • Universal School Choice: This dude wants parents to be able to send their kids to any school they want, public or private. He's all about those charter schools and even vouchers, which apparently might just help rich kids get richer. But hey, at least it pisses off the public school establishment.

  • Patriot Teachers Unite: Trump wants to bring back his beloved 1776 Commission, which was totally dismantled by Biden on his first day like a weak little snowflake. He's also starting a credentialing body to certify teachers who love America and freedom. You know, the ones who teach kids about America's flaws and celebrate July 4th without guilt.

Trump's ideas might be enough to make any social justice warrior teacher explode into a cloud of woke dust. But some people, like Valant, think they're more about politics than actually helping kids. Imagine that, politicizing education. What a novel concept.

So, there you have it, folks. This election, we've got a teacher running for VP and Trump wanting to mix stuff up. God bless America, and f*ck yeah.

Read more: Trump's Agenda47 on education: Abolish teacher tenure, universal school choice, patriotism