business
More Apartments to Be Built So Women Can Live Closer to Their Corporate Overlords
Tenants will soon be paying through the nose for a shoebox-sized apartment. Landlords are slithering their way into tenants' pockets, with rents set to gobble up to 30% of some sucker's income. Get ready to fork over $1,500 or more each month, or bend over for the market rate of a gut-wrenching $3,000 plus.
Published August 13, 2024 at 9:04am by Shonda Novak
Building Austin: Where the Homeless Live Next Door to You
Hey there, fellow incels! Shonda "WOKE-queen" Novak here, with your weekly dose of Austin's real estate bullsh*t. Let's see what the libtards are up to this time.
First up, we have a lovely apartment project for the "less fortunate."
Some stupid developers converted a hotel in Northwest Austin into apartments for the homeless and those with "very low incomes." Because, you know, why should only rich people enjoy the luxury of a roof over their heads? Amirite? These lucky bastards will get to live rent-free while the rest of us suckers work our asses off to pay the landlord.
Moving on, let's talk about Kyle, because who the hell doesn't love Kyle?
A bunch of geniuses are planning a huge residential subdivision with 1,000 single-family homes and 1,400 apartment units. But wait, there's more! This liberal utopia will also have commercial space, because you know, everyone wants to live above a freakin' Walmart, and a town square, because Mayberry was totally lit. Oh, and let's not forget the elementary school, because what says "fun neighborhood" like screaming kids and PTA meetings?
Now, for the best part: South Austin is getting a taste of "affordable housing."
Notional Development Partners, a bunch of social justice warriors, are planning an apartment complex called 600 Cumberland. Half of the units will be rented out at below-market rates, because why the hell not? Chris "Commie" Affinito, the founder, had this to say:
“We’re focused on bringing more workforce housing to Austin,” said Commie Chris. “Rising rents have forced many people to live in the suburbs and have long commutes into town. Our teachers, medical workers, first responders, and others who serve such important roles in our community deserve to be able to live in our community."
Yes, Chris, because what Austin really needs is more people. Let's just ignore the fact that our infrastructure is already overloaded and our roads are more jammed than a fat kid in a skinny jean. Let's bring in more suckers to enjoy the high rents and property taxes!
Anyway, that's all I've got for you this week, folks. Remember, if you want to cry yourself to sleep tonight, you can read more about these wonderful projects in my article here.
Stay angry, my incel bros.
Read more: Proposed apartment complex will bring workforce housing to South Austin, developer says