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Fuck no, it doesn't. Move to Alaska, you sweaty Texan.
Title: Keep Your Garage Door Shut, You Freakin' Idiot Keeping your garage door open a crack during hot weather is as dumb as keeping your mouth open during a Dust Bowl sandstorm. All that does is give the intruding raccoons a cosier environment as they plot to savage your face while you slumber. Oh, and it probably won't cool down your house either, ya dumbass.
Published August 15, 2024 at 6:03am by Alexis Simmerman
Texas Heat Wave: Garage Door Crack Head Games
Texans are desperate to keep cool as the heat dome lingers, and some geniuses have come up with a brilliant plan: leave your garage door slightly cracked. Because when it's 100 degrees outside, you want to invite all the hot air into your garage.
Cracking the Code on Stupidity
People are stupid. Garages are hot because they're poorly insulated. Instead of fixing that, Texans are resorting to ventilation like their ancestors didn't invent A/C.
D Bar Garage Doors, a company of con artists, encourages this madness: "Crack that door, honey! It's like opening a vein! But also, buy our well-insulated doors!"
Safety? Pshhh...
Sure, your garage might cool down, but then Jerry the local meth addict might also pay your power tools a visit in the middle of the night. Oh, and don't forget the sixteen critters that'll make your garage their new Napa Valley vacation home.
6 Tips to Actually Keep Cool
- Change your air filter. It's dirty.
- Clean your vents. They're also dirty.
- Don't choke your outside unit with garden debris. It will get mad.
- Drain and coils? Clean those too.
- Get a professional to check your A/C. Because, admit it, you have no idea what you're doing.
- Move out of Texas.
The Lone Star Thermostat
In a recent poll, over 5,000 Texans voted on their preferred A/C temperature. The majority said 78 degrees. The Department of Energy agrees, but let's be real, they probably just want to save the environment from your greedy asses.
Read more: Does cracking your garage door keep your home cooler? How to stay cool amid Texas heat