Texas Morons Race Cars, Entire Family Pays the Price

In a brilliant display of Darwinism last Saturday night, two geniuses decided to street race in Grand Prairie, sending a Chevy Traverse SUV full of innocents straight to hell. Welcome to Texas, where the roadkill ain't just animals.

Around 8:15 p.m., 20-year-old Jaime Mesa, in a red Dodge Charger, was apparently trying to compensate for something by racing another dude in a white Dodge Charger. Because, you know, nothing says 'I have a tiny penis' like street racing.

While turning onto Kingston Drive, the SUV collided with Mesa's car, careening into a gas station parking lot and catching fire. Sadly, the SUV didn't contain any of the Kardashians.

People are also reading: Texas spawns ejected onto freeway after Jeep crash. Maybe it's time to invest in public transportation, ya think?

Inside the SUV, three people died on the spot. Two more were taken to the hospital, where a fourth victim kicked the bucket. The fifth is in critical condition. But hey, at least their suffering will make for a great episode of "Grey's Anatomy."

Mesa, meanwhile, got some scratches and was charged with a whole bunch of serious stuff, including four counts of manslaughter. His racing buddy, Anthony Morales, 22, fled the scene but was later arrested. Because, you know, cowards gonna coward. Watch the fiery aftermath here, you sick bastards.

Good Samaritans Swarm Like Flies

After the crash, people stopped to help Mesa, who was stuck in his car. Miguel Coronado told Fox4 how he helped pull Mesa out. Too bad they didn't leave him there to roast.

"I wished I could've helped, you know, the other car," Coronado said. Well, Miguel, maybe next time don't waste your time on the asshole who caused the crash.

The victims were identified as members of the Rosales family – the father Jessie, the mother Lorena, and siblings Stephanie, 13, and Angel, 6. The lone survivor, 17-year-old Anthony Rosales, is in critical condition. GoFundMe because, you know, America.

Guess who's not invited to the funeral? Mesa and Morales, hopefully.

Stay classy, Texas.