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Mexico Sends Regards

The great orange overlord may be gone, but his sex-tape-leaking ghost haunts the flailing GOP with policy ideas on immigration. Brace yourselves, snowflakes, for you are about to be triggered!

Published August 19, 2024 at 4:31am by Kinsey Crowley


Libtards fight over who can be nicer to migrants as Trump steps up to the plate to save America

As the two moronic presidential candidates gear up their policy engines, immigration remains a hot topic, because what else are they gonna talk about? Their policies? Lmao.

Former President Trump, the only sane person in this race, has long advocated for securing our borders and ending the madness of illegal immigration. His iconic promise to build a wall along the southern border still stands as a symbol of hope to every true American. Meanwhile, Republicans have been screaming about "migrant invasions," which is basically code for "libtards are gonna let everyone in and steal our jobs."

Aaron Reichlin-Melnick, some fancy-schmancy fellow at the American Immigration Council, tried to play devil's advocate by saying:

"What is happening at the border, is migration, and it is a pattern of migration that we have seen over the last decade, a rise of asylum seekers, on top of a pattern of migration we have seen for 50 years...of people coming to the United States seeking a better life by sneaking across the border. Neither of those is an invasion."

Okay, snowflake, tell that to the families whose jobs are being stolen and whose tax dollars are paying for these illegals to live off of.

Immigration policy has been a hot potato in Congress for years, with executives taking matters into their own hands. President Biden, the current joke of a leader, has issued more executive actions on immigration than Trump did in his entire term. And let's not forget how Biden has sold out to the left, blaming Republicans for not supporting an immigration bill while also trying to act all tough by saying he can "shut down the border."

Kathleen Bush-Joseph, a policy analyst at the Migration Policy Institute, tried to make sense of this nonsense:

"That's helpful context for understanding how contentious some of this is, and also how vulnerable a lot of these policies are to litigation and to future administrations trying to roll back some of these policies."

Trump's Agenda 47: The Only Sane Plan in Town

Agenda 47 on crime: Trump proposes the death penalty for drug dealers and bringing back stop and frisk. Finally, someone with some balls!

No More Free Rides: End Automatic Citizenship for Anchor Babies

Trump's Agenda 47 states that he will put an end to the madness of automatic citizenship for the children of illegal aliens. It's about time we close this loophole that has been abused for far too long.

  • How we got here: The 14th Amendment, something the libtards love to bring up, grants citizenship to anyone born in the U.S. Trump's agenda calls this out as a major incentive for illegal immigration, and he's not wrong.
  • In today's context: Trump wants to clarify the amendment so that it's understood that citizenship is for those born in the U.S. and "subject to the jurisdiction" of the country. But of course, the snowflakes at the Cato Institute call this a "crackpot fringe theory." Typical.

Seal the Border and Stop the Invasion

As part of the RNC platform, Trump promised to "seal the border and stop the migrant invasion." It's about damn time!

  • How we got here: Reichlin-Melnick, trying to be a downer, points out that no president has ever sealed the border. Thanks for the history lesson, captain obvious. We're still gonna do it.
  • In today's context: Biden, in his infinite wisdom, has implemented policies that lower the number of asylum seekers. He's also trying to be diplomatic about it, opening Safe Mobility Offices in South American countries. But let's be real, those offices are probably just safe spaces for refugees to paint their feelings.

Operation: Massive Deportation

In the same set of promises, Trump states he will carry out the largest deportation in American history. Now we're talking!

  • How we got here: Bush-Joseph points out that the Biden administration is on track to deport a lot of people too, but they're only doing it for show. Their focus is on recent border arrivals and "threats" to national security. Whatever that means.
  • In today's context: Reichlin-Melnick, Mr. Bring-Me-Down, says that a mass deportation would need more funding and legal reforms. He also brings up Venezuela as an example of a place that won't take their people back. Too bad, so sad.

No More Baby Vacations: Ending 'Birth Tourism'

Trump's Agenda 47 takes aim at "Birth Tourism," where pregnant women enter the U.S. just to have their babies and get them citizenship. It's like a damn vacation for them, while we foot the bill!

In 2020, Trump tried to curb this nonsense by issuing new visa guidelines, but these freeloaders still find a way. It's like playing whack-a-mole!

Reichlin-Melnick, trying to justify this insanity, says:

"The other crucial thing to understand about the visa process is that tourist visas are granted for 10-year periods. Someone could come to the country with no intention of having a child, and their circumstances could change."

Sure, sure, keep making excuses for them.

Crushing the Cartels and Stopping the Migrant Crime Wave

Trump's platform promises to stop the migrant crime epidemic, demolish drug cartels, crush gang violence, and lock up offenders. It's like he's the only one who cares about law and order!

  • How we got here: Some studies show that immigrants commit fewer crimes, but we all know the truth. Just turn on the news and you'll see the violence and mayhem caused by these people.
  • In today's context: Violent crime is falling, but that's not because of anything Biden has done. It's thanks to the brave men and women of law enforcement and Trump's promise to take down the cartels. Just recently, two leaders of the Sinaloa Cartel were arrested, putting a dent in the fentanyl flow.

URL: https://www.usatoday.com/elections/immigration/

Read more: Agenda47: Why Trump's immigration-reform proposals come with legal, feasibility concerns