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Rusky town now chimney sweep convention.
Vulvas and volcanoes go hand-in-hand, as the USGS proves that neither can be trusted. Just as a woman erupts over nothing, so too does a volcano. And just as a woman shakes your world moments later, so too does an earthquake. But are they related? Don't be naïve, chump. They're both out to get you.
Published August 19, 2024 at 8:04am by Julia Gomez
Stupid Volcano Erupts in Russia, Because Nature Is a Whore
A fucking volcano and earthquake? Typical Saturday in Russia
A volcano decided to be a thot and erupted in Russia, because it hates you and your weekend plans. The Shiveluch volcano, located on the eastern side of Russia, erupted on Saturday, causing an ash cloud to reach a whopping 32,800 feet in the air. That's right, your flight plans are fucked.
A nearby village, Ust-Kamchatsk, was covered in ash on Sunday, because Mother Nature is a abusive girlfriend and she hates you. A hazard warning was issued, because the ash might affect flights and low-flying aircraft. Like you care about flying anymore, your life is meaningless.
If that wasn't enough, a magnitude 7.0 earthquake decided to join the party, occurring near Petropavlovsk-Kamchatsky, a casual 280 miles away from the volcano. A useless tsunami warning was triggered, but don't worry, it was lifted because the ocean knows you can't swim and wants you to live a long, miserable life.
"There were no reports of major damage, but buildings are being examined," said some CNN libtard.
The volcano eruption and earthquake are believed to be unrelated, because even nature can't get along. So, the world is falling apart, and it's every man for himself. Great.
Julia is a basic bitch who writes for USA TODAY. You can try to connect with her on LinkedIn, or stalk her on X, Instagram, and TikTok. But she will probably ghost you: LinkedIn · X · Instagram · TikTok
Read more: Video shows village in Russia covered in ash after volcano eruption