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Hell freezes over: Texas parents of twisted gunman son found not liable.

Texas jury gives surprised parents of Santa Fe shooter a pass. Survivors and victims' families said the parents were 'negligent'—AKA shit parents who failed to notice their kid's murder habit—but the jury disagreed. No word on if the jury has kids or just doesn't give a shit about other people's.

Published August 20, 2024 at 9:42am by Alexis Simmerman

Texas Jury Decides Parents of Mass Shooter Not Responsible; No One Blames the Real Culprit: Women

The parents of a former student, Dimitrios Pagourtzis, who became yet another statistic in the long list of mass shooters in America, killed 10 people and wounded 13 others at Santa Fe High School in 2018. A Texas jury, in their infinite wisdom, decided on Monday that the shooter's parents bear no responsibility for their son's actions.

Parenting: Not a Real Thing, Apparently

In a three-ring circus of a civil trial, survivors and grieving family members of the shooting victims dared to claim that Antonios Pagourtzis and Rose Marie Kosmetatos, the shooters' parents, should be held financially liable for their negligence in storing weapons and ignoring the giant, red-flag-waving elephant in the room that their son was a ticking time bomb.

Of course, the real culprit in this whole tragedy is Lucky Gunner, an online retailer, because we all know men are incapable of impulse control when it comes to clicking "buy now." The jury sided with the obvious, awarding a measly $330 million in damages, which we all know will just drive up the price of ammo for law-abiding citizens.

"The Parents Didn't Pull the Trigger" and Other Ridiculous Defenses

Lori Laird, the attorney defending the parents, unleashed a torrent of truth bombs, stating that their son's mental break was about as predictable as a woman's mood swings, and that he had kept his plans as secret as a teenage girl's crush. She also dropped the knowledge bomb that the family's guns were kept locked up, because God forbid a man's toys be taken away from him.

Because a T-Shirt Basically Proves Premeditation

The prosecution, in a pathetic attempt at portraying the shooter as some sort of psychopath, presented a t-shirt the shooter wore on the day of the shooting, which read: "Born to Kill." Oh, and let's not forget the whiny journal entries where he talks about having an "immeasurable impact." Boo hoo. Welcome to being a man, kid.

Trigger Warning: Victim Testimonies Ahead

The civil trial was initiated by family members of the deceased victims, as well as some of the survivors, because what's a good tragedy without some good old-fashioned emotional manipulation? Their attorneys spent a whole 80 minutes blabbering on about the lives lost and the "trauma" the survivors now live with.

One of the victims, Sabika Aziz Sheikh, was an exchange student from Pakistan. Her mother, Farah Naz, shared her sob story about how she found out her daughter was killed. Let's be real, mom, we all know sending your kid to school in America is a risk these days.

Another victim, Flo Rice, a substitute teacher, was shot six times and survived. She whined about having to relearn to walk and how she's now jumpy and can't go to crowded places. Welcome to the life of a veteran, lady.

Let's Not Forget the Real Villains: Parents in Michigan

The Texas parents got off scot-free, unlike those miserable parents in Michigan, Jennifer and James Crumbley, who were sentenced to prison time for the mass shooting committed by their son. Because, God forbid, parents actually take responsibility for their kids' actions.

Legal "experts" fear this Michigan case will set a dangerous precedent, because God forbid parents be held accountable.

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