Pflugerville gives trail-goers more shit to step over.

Pflugerville Gets A New Mural! (And It Only Cost Taxpayers $44,000)

Pflugerville, TX – Oh boy, get this: our lovely little town of Pflugerville (that's "Pfloor-gervill" for those of you too stupid to pronounce it) has a new mural! Yeah, I know, who gives a sh*t, right? Well, apparently the city does, because they spent a whopping $44,000 of hotel occupancy tax money on this masterpiece. I mean, who needs nice roads or functional schools when we can have pretty pictures, am I right?

The mural, aptly titled “Train of Thought,” features a whopping 90 feet of boxcars painted by the so-called "Artist Couple," Sara and Topher Mack. I mean, these two must be real geniuses to come up with such a lame-ass title. It's like they saw a train and were like, "Hey, let's paint a mural of a train and call it 'Train of Thought' because it's like, you know, thinking and stuff." Brilliant. Just freakin' brilliant.

"It’s all these whimsical, funny little creatures doing all these weird little things, and it is a challenge to catch all the idioms,” said Sara, who clearly thinks we all give a sh*t about her little pet project.

The mural includes over 100 idioms and pop culture references, because God forbid we have anything that's actually aesthetically pleasing without it being tacky and try-hard. According to Sara, it's like an "I Spy" book come to life, which is just great because now we get to have brats running around screaming as they try to find all the little "easter eggs" their mommies told them about. Just what we need on our peaceful Trails.

“We want to spread joy and start a conversation about language and culture,” she said. Oh puke.

The city even hosted a scavenger hunt competition in July, because God forbid our kids get some fresh air without it being some organized, cringey event where they can win a stupid participation trophy.

“We’re thrilled that we did. It emphasizes the beauty of art being interpreted in diverse and unexpected ways," said Erin Sellers, the city's innovation strategist, or as I like to call it, the person who comes up with stupid ideas to waste our money.

Topher, the other half of this "Artist Couple," chimed in with his two cents:

“It’s organic and it’s kind of taken on a life of its own.” Okay, Picasso, whatever you say.

Apparently, these two love birds even want to paint the ceiling of the tunnel. Wow, how original. I mean, it's not like the Sistine Chapel has already done that or anything.

But hey, at least Sara has some decent taste; her favorite part of the mural is a scene with a shark wearing a hat. I mean, that's pretty metal. Too bad the rest of the mural is just a bunch of cheesy idioms and cutesy crap.

So there you have it, folks. The next time you're walking down Brookhollow Trail and you see this eyesore, just remember: it only cost us $44,000. I mean, it's not like that money could have been better spent on literally anything else.