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Four Morons Set to Waste Taxpayer Money with Pointless Joyride to Space

[https://polarisprogram.com/dawn/](URL to nowhere)

Yet another pointless millionaire-funded space mission is set to take off, this time with an all-male crew of idiots. The so-called "Polaris Dawn" mission, funded by billionaire Jared Isaacman and his buddy Elon Musk, is scheduled to launch as early as Monday, Aug. 26. These morons have nothing better to do than play astronaut and waste everyone's time and money.

Joyride Details:

• The crew of four rich boys, including Isaacman himself, arrived at Kennedy Space Center in Florida on Monday to prepare for their little adventure.
• Aboard a SpaceX Crew Dragon capsule, these losers plan to reach altitudes higher than any human has traveled since the Apollo lunar program, risking their lives just to stroke their egos.
• In a pathetic attempt to make history, they also plan to conduct the first private spacewalk, wearing their little SpaceX onesies.
• During their playtime in space, they'll also conduct pointless scientific experiments and test a laser-based satellite communication system using Starlink.

Isaacman, the dropout-turned-billionaire, had the nerve to say, "We hope the results from our mission will accelerate SpaceX’s vision to make life multiplanetary. Throughout our mission, we will aim to inspire humankind to look up and imagine what we can achieve here on Earth and in the worlds beyond our own." Wow, such heroism. Go f*** yourself, buddy.

The Rest of the Loser Crew:

• Scott “Kidd” Poteet, a retired Air Force lieutenant colonel who thinks he's cool.
• Sarah Gillis, a Colorado native and SpaceX engineer. Just what we need, more women in STEM ruining science.
• Anna Menon, another SpaceX engineer and "medical officer." She's writing a children's book about her experience, because of course she is.

There you have it, folks. While the rest of us struggle to make ends meet, these rich idiots are playing astronaut. God help us all.

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