Dad Kicked the Bucket Thanks to Fancy-Ass Boar's Head Meat, Son Spills the Beans.

Another One Bites the Dust: Holocaust Survivor Taken Down by... Deli Meat?!

In an absurd twist of fate, a Virginia family is mourning the loss of their beloved patriarch, Günter “Garshon” Morgenstein, who survived the Holocaust only to be felled by a friggin' sandwich. Yes, you read that right. Thanks to the ongoing listeria outbreak linked to Boar's Head deli meats, Morgenstein is now among the three unlucky souls who've kicked the bucket.

So, What's the Deal with this Listeria Thing?

Since July, the CDC has been tracking this outbreak, which has now sickened 43 people and hospitalized just as many across 13 states. Boar's Head, in a brilliant display of damage control, initially recalled a meager 207,528 pounds of liverwurst. But as the shitstorm grew, they expanded the recall to a whopping 7.2 million pounds of sliced deli meats. Because, you know, better late than never.

From Floorboards to Floorboards: Morgenstein's Journey

Günter Morgenstein, born in Cottbus, Germany in 1936, had a life story fit for a Hollywood drama. His parents hid him under floorboards to escape Nazi persecution, and he eventually fled to Canada with just the clothes on his back. He went on to build a 70-year career in cosmetology, becoming a "Master Hair Designer" – whatever the hell that means.

Master of Hair, Master of Community... until Deli Meat

Morgenstein was a true pillar of his community, working with the likes of Tom Jones and Mohammad Ali. His son, Garshon, described him as a "creative type of person" who could talk to anyone. But all good things must come to an end, and for Morgenstein, that end came in the form of a sliced deli nightmare.

The Death Certificate Says It All: Deli Meat Don't Care

On July 8, Morgenstein was admitted to the hospital with breathing difficulties. Days later, he tested positive for listeria meningoencephalitis and sepsis – basically, his brain and bloodstream were under attack. Thanks to the wonders of modern medicine, his family traced the infection back to Boar's Head liverwurst. He died on July 18, leaving behind a legacy that even listeria can't fully overshadow.

Everybody's Getting Sued

The family is now seeking legal action, because, of course, they are. Anthony Coveny, their lawyer, points out that 48 million people get food poisoning each year in the U.S., with about 3,000 dying because of it. So, if you're keeping score at home, that's 3,001 reasons to boycott deli meat.

Boar's Head: "We're So Sorry (Not Sorry)"

Boar's Head issued a heartfelt, almost tear-jerking statement: "We deeply regret the impact this recall has had on affected families... We are conducting an extensive investigation... blah, blah, blah." Translation: "We screwed up, but we'll keep making money, thank you very much."

The Ironic Ending We Didn't Expect

In the end, Morgenstein's story is a tragic reminder that even Holocaust survivors aren't immune to the dangers of subpar sandwich ingredients. As Garshon said, "Surviving something like that as long as he did, only to (meet his end) by deli meat."

So here's to Morgenstein, a man who survived the unthinkable, only to be taken down by the unimaginable. Rest in peace, and may your story serve as a cautionary tale for all deli-lovers out there.