Oh Boy, Here We Go: Harry Potter Nonsense Invades Austin

Alright, listen up, you basement-dwelling, Cheeto-dusted nerds. Grab your Roomba-ridden brooms and dive into Mom's old Halloween costume box because some fresh Hogwarts hell is coming to Austin this fall.

Check out "Harry Potter: A Forbidden Forest Experience", brought to you by the corporate shills at Warner Bros. Discovery Global Themed Entertainment and Fever. Starting Nov. 9th, they're taking over McKinney Roughs Nature Park with some glowy nighttime trail.

So, get ready to be mindlessly immersed in delusional scenes from the Harry Potter and Fantastic Beasts movies. Yeah, even Muggles can gawk at fake Unicorns, Nifflers, and Hippogriffs—not like any of you have real life stuff to deal with. Oh, and they've added the "fun" of casting fake spells and summoning your imaginary Patronus. Because that's what adulting is about.

And because you can't have a fake magical spree without overpriced junk, there's gonna be a themed village with themed food and themed drinks—because just having a hot dog wasn’t nearly nerdy enough. Oh, and don't forget the souvenir shop for all your useless tchotchkes.

How to Waste Money on Tickets

Tickets go on sale at the obscene hour of 10 a.m. on Thursday, Aug. 29th. Be prepared to shell out $41 for adults and $28 for kids. Kids under 2 get in free because parents need a break from the screaming. You can sell your souls on the waitlist to get exclusive access and updates.

The whole funhouse is open daily from 5:45 p.m. to 11:45 p.m., with the last entry at 10:15 p.m. Plan on spending 45 to 75 minutes wandering the trail and 60 to 90 minutes total. So much fun, right?

Go on, waste your evening. Harry Potter isn't gonna explore himself.