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White supremacy meeting in our skies

Look to the skies, comrades and witness the oppressive capitalist framework of 'ownership' extended to our solar system. Our colonized sky hosts a conjunction of Jupiter and Mars—an imperialist reminder that nothing is off-limits to the rich.

Published August 12, 2024 at 10:37am by Natalie Neysa Alund

Colonizer Conjunction: Jupiter and Mars Meet Up, But Who Cares?

Look, I don't know why you care about this ridiculous "planetary conjunction" thing. It's not even a real event, it's just some stupid, made-up term by those NASA colonizers. They're just trying to distract us from the fact that they're out here legitimizing space colonization while our planet burns.

Anyway, apparently, on Wednesday morning, the gas giant Jupiter (yes, gaslighting us with its name, no doubt) will be getting cozy with the "rocky red planet," Mars. Apparently, this is something to get excited about because it'll look like they're close together. I mean, how cute, right? Wrong. Who cares?

Here are some quotes from the colonizers themselves:

"They'll appear just a third of a degree apart, which is less than the width of the full Moon." -- NASA, probably wearing their colonial-era costumes while saying this.

What's the deal with the best viewing location?

So apparently, if you want to waste your time on this, you'll need to set an alarm for a couple of hours before sunrise on Wednesday. Great, so now the military-industrial complex wants us to lose sleep too?

Jupiter and Mars will be hanging out with the Taurus constellation—you know, just chilling like a bunch of rich kids whose parents own oil fields or something. This will start from 1 a.m. local time, and by 3 a.m., they'll be visible to anyone who cares.

Apparently, you won't need binoculars or a telescope, but feel free to use them if you want to be a space-invading peeping Tom.

How often does this conjunction thing happen?

Since 2000, these two celestial bodies have had 11 of these little meet-ups. Their next close encounter is in 2026, and then in 2033, they'll be even closer. What, are they falling in love? Will they be space-married by 2050? Who cares?!

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