Oh for f**k's sake, it's ACL Fest time again, y'all!

Alright, buckle up, buttercups. The Austin City Limits Music Festival is back and queerer than ever! Here's your liberal-as-hell guide to all the acts you must see to keep your woke cred alive.

Friday's F**k Yeah! List

MARS SALAZAR'S * Don't @ Me PICKS*

2:00 PM: Sir Chloe (T-Mobile) - Vermont indie rock that's not just for Bernie bros. They're queer, they're here, and they're pissed off. Deal with it.

3:10 PM: Mannequin Pussy (Miller Lite) - Philly punk that's not afraid to get political. Finally, someone who gets it.

5:10 PM: Dexter and the Moonrocks (BMI) - Alt-rock with a southern twist. It's like if Bisexual Taylor Swift formed a band with the ghost of Karl Marx.

6:10 PM: Foster the People (Honda) - Remember "Pumped Up Kicks"? Yeah, me neither. But they're still around, and apparently, they've got a new album. Yay, capitalism.

7:30 PM: The Marías (T-Mobile) - Dream pop from a pair of exes who still know how to make beautiful music together. Relationship goals, TBH.

8:10 PM: blink-182 (Honda) - The kings of pop-punk are back, baby! Time to pretend we're all 16 again and scream "All The Small Things" at the top of our lungs.

RAMON RAMIREZ'S Woke As F**k PICKS

1:15 PM: Midnight Navy (Tito’s) - Local saxophonist and producer. Perfect for when you want to feel sophisticated but also like you could burn down the patriarchy at any moment.

1:40 PM: Katie Pruitt (Miller Lite) - Nashville songwriter who's not afraid to call out Jesus freaks and tarot card-loving secular friends. Preach, sister.

4:10 PM: Norah Jones (Honda) - Is she the GOAT Starbucks artist? Problematic fave alert. But hey, at least she's not a TERF.

4:30 PM: Carín León (American Express) - Sonora's finest, blending corridos, accordion-drenched norteño, and Latin dance subgenres. Viva la revolución!

8:10 PM: Blink-182 (American Express) - See above. But also, f**k Tom DeLonge for voting for Trump.

DEBORAH SENGUPTA STITH'S Intersectional AF PICKS

12:55 PM: Asleep at the Wheel (Honda) - Western swing legends. If you can't appreciate this, you're probably a white supremacist.

1:40 PM: Mon Rovia (BMI) - Afro-Appalachian folk from a former child soldier. If this doesn't make you want to dismantle imperialism, I don't know what will.

2:45 PM: Dasha (American Express) - Nashville-based, Cali native with a takedown of Austin and a killer hook. Eat the rich, y'all.

4:10 PM: Norah Jones (Honda) - See above. But also, why are there so many white people here?!

6:30 PM: Leon Bridges (American Express) - Soulful sounds from Fort Worth. He's collaborated with everyone from Kacey Musgraves to Maggie Rogers. Yes, daddy.

8:30 PM: Chris Stapleton (Honda) - Dust off your "Broken Halos" and get ready to sing along to "Tennessee Whiskey." Just don't be that guy who requests "Free Bird."

Saturday's F**k the Police List

MARS SALAZAR'S Eat the Rich PICKS

12:40 PM: The Criticals (Honda) - Nashville-based alt-pop duo. They're probably problematic, but at least they're not country.

2:10 PM: Something Corporate (Honda) - Early-2000s rock band. Probably voted for Bush, but hey, at least they're not Nickelback.

5:20 PM: wave to earth (IHG) - Indie rock trio from South Korea. Asian representation, y'all!

6:20 PM: Kenny Beats (Tito’s) - Hip-hop producer who's worked with everyone from Rico Nasty to FKA Twigs. Finally, a straight white guy we can stan.

7:20 PM: Vince Staples (IHG) - Actual hip-hop from a real Black man. Yes, queen!

RAMON RAMIREZ'S Dismantle the Patriarchy PICKS

11:55 AM: Godly the Ruler (Miller Lite) - Nigerian-born Chicagoan with bars for days. Black Lives Matter, y'all.

3:10 PM: Telescreens (BMI) - East Village scenesters who know how to rock. Gentrification sucks, but this band doesn't.

3:20 PM: The Beaches (T-Mobile) - Toronto rock quartet with crisp vocals and new wave production. Canada: doing it right since forever.

6:10 PM: Benson Boone (Honda) - Outlaw country from a 22-year-old Cancer. Millennials are ruining country music, and I'm here for it.

6:20 PM: Khruangbin (American Express) - Houston jam trio that's been around forever. Olds, amirite?

8:20 PM: Dua Lipa (American Express) - Pop princess who's taken over the world. Bow down, bitches.

DEBORAH SENGUPTA STITH'S Smash Fascism PICKS

11:55 AM: Obed Padilla (BMI) - Cali lowrider with horn-laced, Chicano rap bravado. La raza resiste!

2:05 PM: Brittany Davis (Tito’s) - Non-binary, blind, and poor Black artist who's breaking down barriers. F**k capitalism, f**k the police, f**k ableism, f**k everything!

3:10 PM: Say She She (Honda) - Transatlantic trio weaving tight harmonies into joyous siren songs. Girl power!

6:20 PM: Khruangbin (American Express) - See above. But also, why are there so many old people here?!

7:10 PM: Jungle (Miller Light) or 7:20 PM: Reneé Rapp (T Mobile) - Groove machine Jungle or breakout pop star Reneé Rapp? Choices, choices.

8:20 PM: Dua Lipa (American Express) - See above. But also, why are there so many straight people here?!

Sunday's Burn It All Down List

MARS SALAZAR'S Revolution Now PICKS

1:30 PM: West 22nd (Tito’s) - UT Austin student band with fresh-faced, boy band indie rock. Straight white boys: not always the enemy.

2:45 PM: Flipturn (American Express) - Lovechild of The Lumineers and 2010’s indie rock. Basically, every white girl's dream.

4:25 PM: Orville Peck (Honda) - South African country musician who never shows his face. Mysterious AF, and I'm here for it.

5:45 PM: Kevin Abstract (IHG) - Rapper and founding member of the acclaimed rap collective BROCKHAMPTON. BARS, BARS, BARS.

6:45 PM: Chappell Roan (American Express) - Pop megastar who's bigger than ACL. YAAAS QUEEN SLAY!

8:45 PM: Tyler, the Creator (American Express) - Rapper, producer, fashion designer, and all-around creative genius. If you don't stan Tyler, you're canceled.

RAMON RAMIREZ'S No Justice, No Peace PICKS

3:25 PM: Vlad Holiday (BMI) - New York songwriter and former singer of indie band Born Cages. Indie sleaze forever!

3:45 PM: Bakar (T-Mobile) - London singer with a buzz-worthy single. Let's see if he lives up to the hype.

5:45 PM: That Mexican OT (T-Mobile) - Rapper who can go bar-for-bar with Houston legends. Representation matters, y'all.

6:45 PM: Chappell Roan (American Express) - See above. But also, why are there so many cis people here?!

8:25 PM: Sturgill Simpson **(Honda) - Outlaw country singer who's not afraid to speak his mind. Finally, a straight white guy who gets it.

DEBORAH SENGUPTA STITH'S F**k the System PICKS

1:15 PM: Empress Of (American Express) - Honduran American singer-songwriter with poignant meditation on messy love. Love is love, y'all.

2:45 PM: Glass Beams (Tito’s) - Mysterious trio playing a shimmery mesh of Eastern sounds and desert psychedelia. Don't @ me, I'm vibing.

3:45 PM: Myles Smith (IHG) - British pop breakout opening for Ed Sheeran. Basic, but I'll allow it.

7:25 PM: Kehlani (Miller Lite) - Soulful pop to get down with your boo. Love wins!

8:45 PM: Tyler, the Creator (American Express) - See above. But also, why are there so many heteros here?!