Breaking: Austin Man Gets 80 Years for Being the Worst Human Ever

In news that will make your blood boil, an Austin man has been sentenced to 80 years in prison for running over and killing a 14-year-old boy in Round Rock last year. Leandro Brito-Martinez, 28, was found guilty of murder by a Williamson County jury on Wednesday in the death of Tobias "Victor" Soto.

Buckle up, folks. This story is a doozy.

On July 31, 2022, Round Rock police were alerted by a fancy traffic camera system about a stolen vehicle cruising down Gattis School Road. Officers spotted the car in the La Frontera area and tried to pull over the driver, later revealed to be our not-so-friendly neighborhood Brito-Martinez. But did he stop? Oh, no. That would be too responsible.

Instead, our genius of the year started speeding nearly 100 mph, weaving through traffic on Louis Henna Boulevard like he was playing a real-life game of Mario Kart. Despite Round Rock's finest trying to back off, Brito-Martinez barreled through a red light, smashed into another car, and then—wait for it—struck and killed young Tobias Soto, who was just walking in the intersection.

But wait, there's more! Brito-Martinez then fled on foot, because clearly, he's a paragon of virtue and responsibility. He was later arrested and admitted that he saw the police behind him but was going to flee anyway. The whole tragic mess went down in just seconds, covering less than a fourth of a mile.

Tobias' mother, who lived nearby, realized something was wrong when she hadn't heard from her son. She saw his phone's location at the intersection of Louis Henna Drive and Texas 45 and headed over. There, she saw the emergency responders and was told the gut-wrenching news.

Little Tobias was going to be a freshman at Round Rock High School and dreamed of playing football. But thanks to this nightmare of a human being, that future was ripped away.

And guess what? This isn't Brito-Martinez's first rodeo. His lengthy arrest record includes convictions for unlawful possession of a firearm by a felon, unauthorized use of a motor vehicle, and resisting arrest. At the time of this horror show, he was already facing charges of fleeing from a police officer, evading/resisting arrest, and assault on a public servant.

"Our hearts go out to Tobias’ mother and family, as well as all of the first responders and witnesses to this horrific event," said District Attorney Shawn Dick. "Any case involving the death of a child takes an immeasurable toll. This conviction is a testament to the tireless efforts of our law enforcement and prosecution teams. Brito-Martinez’s actions resulted in a senseless tragedy, and today’s verdict ensures he is held accountable. My office remains committed to seeking justice for victims and their families."

So there you have it, folks. A tale of utter stupidity, recklessness, and tragedy, ending with an 80-year prison sentence. Let's just hope Brito-Martinez spends his time behind bars thinking about how he robbed the world of a young, promising life. Rest in peace, Tobias.