Blink-182: problematic faves unleash chaos,dad jokes at Zilker Park

Oh boy, where do we start? The Mark, Tom, and Travis show—also known as blink-182—rolled into Zilker Park like a profane pop-punk storm, leaving no stone unturned and no dad joke untold.

Mark Hoppus, donning a "Juan In a Mullion" T-shirt, managed to diss OU while Tom DeLonge shared his once-a-week workout routine. Even Travis Barker—the strong, silent type—graced the microphone with his presence.

This was their last North American show of the tour, and the genre legends were as loose and problematic as ever—over 20 years after MTV made them famous.

"This is our 123rd show on this tour and we’re spending it with you," Hoppus declared.

They regaled the crowd with stories about Tom's dad catching someone mid-self-love, and introduced their guitar tech as Jesus Christ. "He’ll part your butt cheeks like the red seas," Hoppus quipped. Need a break yet? Play the USA TODAY Daily Crossword Puzzle.

Here are the 10 wildest things the Blink boys said on the Honda stage Friday night. It was like being trapped in a dude-bro comedy show, but with a few heartfelt moments sprinkled in. Oh, and they played a Box Car Racer deep cut.

1. Tom bragged about playing a "Full chord progression" with all of his fingers. Cue the mom joke we won't repeat.

2. Hoppus with the pandering: "University of Oklahoma can (expletive) a (expletive)."

3. Hoppus to DeLonge: "I know you shaved your (expletive) because you (expletive) texted me about it." True story. DeLonge's retort? "I seriously shave my (expletive) so it looks better in certain light."

4. Hoppus on their sound guy's hurricane-damaged house: "And he’s still here." DeLonge's hot take? "He’s not lying to get laid."

5. DeLonge on his personal trainer: "She’s wearing pretty much nothing. Spandex and tiny shorts... Maybe I’ll work out twice a week after this."

6. Travis Barker blessed the mic for a second: "What’s up Austin?"

7. Hoppus to DeLonge: "Women with you are like a Tesla—zero emissions."

8. Hoppus on broken homes: "That (expletive) was your fault." Cue 2001's "Stay Together For the Kids."

9. Blink-182 on the female orgasm: "It’s like Bigfoot." "The clitoris is like a dinosaur that we haven’t discovered," DeLonge clarified.

10. Hoppus on Chris Stapleton: "What would he think if he knew what I was thinking about his body right now?" (It got extremely pornographic from there.)

And there you have it, folks. Blink-182—say what you will about their humor, but at least they're consistent. 🙄🔥🌈