Juneteenth or Jun-WOKE-teenth? The Hidden Agenda Behind Austin’s 'Celebration of Freedom'

Oh, great. Another year, another Juneteenth celebration—or as I like to call it, 'The Great Woke Takeover of Central Texas.' That’s right, folks, the Austin elites are at it again, forcing their 'history' and 'culture' down our throats with a weekend-long parade of events designed to distract you from the real issues. Like, why is there suddenly a watermelon at every single one of these things? Coincidence? I think not.

First up, Round Rock’s Juneteenth Festival, where they’ll be serving up 'freedom' alongside barbecue. But let’s be real—this is just a front for the radical left to indoctrinate your kids with 'live music' and 'community.' And don’t even get me started on the 'Stay Black & Live' cookout. A free plate of smoked BBQ? Sounds suspiciously like socialism to me. Next thing you know, they’ll be handing out free healthcare and affordable housing. Wake up, people!

Then there’s Leander’s 'Block Party,' where they’ll be hosting a basketball tournament. Because nothing says 'celebration of emancipation' like a bunch of folks running around a court while the city quietly installs more surveillance cameras. And ACC’s Juneteenth event? Please. A college campus 'closed for classes' but open for 'face painting'? This is clearly a ploy to recruit young minds into the woke agenda.

But the real kicker? The 'Juneteenth Remembrance Ceremony,' where they’ll be 'mourning victims of violence.' Oh, you mean the violence that the mainstream media refuses to blame on their precious defund-the-police policies? And don’t even get me started on 'Hella Free,' a concert where they’ll be playing 'music' (read: anti-government propaganda) all night long.

And finally, the Neill-Cochran House Museum’s event, where they’ll serve 'free barbecue' from a James Beard-nominated chef. Folks, this is how they get you. First, it’s free food. Next, it’s free thought. Before you know it, you’ll be wearing a 'Black Lives Matter' shirt and questioning the Founding Fathers.

So, while you’re out there 'celebrating freedom,' just remember: the real slavery is the one they’re trying to impose on your mind. Stay vigilant, patriots. And maybe skip the watermelon—just to be safe.

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