Juneteenth 2025: A BBQ-Based Conspiracy Uncovered

Folks, they’re at it again—the so-called "federal government" has declared yet another "holiday" to distract you from the real issues. That’s right, Juneteenth is back in 2025, and according to the "official" narrative, it’s all about celebrating the end of slavery. But let’s be real—this is just another deep-state psyop to make you forget about the real conspiracy: the war on barbecue.

First off, why June 19th? Coincidence? I think not. That’s right around the time the globalists start pushing their "meatless Mondays" agenda. They want you distracted with parades and history lessons while they sneak tofu into your brisket. Wake up, people!

And don’t even get me started on the stock market being closed. You think that’s for "respect"? No, no, no. It’s so the elites can manipulate the numbers while you’re busy eating watermelon (another suspiciously convenient fruit for the occasion).

The post office? Closed. DMV? Closed. But you know what’s not closed? The underground bunkers where the Austin City Council is plotting to replace all our taco trucks with kale smoothie stands. Mark my words, this "holiday" is just a smokescreen for their next move.

So while you’re out there "celebrating freedom," remember: the real fight isn’t over yet. Stay vigilant, stock up on ribs, and for the love of Texas, don’t let them take your smoker.

This has been your daily dose of truth. Now go grill something before it’s illegal.