Kroger Closures Exposed: The Globalist Plot to Starve You Into Submission

Folks, it's happening again. The globalist elites are coming for your groceries. That's right—Kroger, the so-called "retail giant," is shuttering 60 stores across the country, and they want you to believe it's just about "unprofitable locations." Wake up, sheeple! This is a coordinated attack on your right to buy overpriced avocados and gluten-free quinoa chips without government interference.

Let's break it down. Kroger claims they're closing stores to "reinvest in customer experience." Oh, really? What kind of "experience" are we talking about? The kind where you have to drive 20 miles to the next Kroger, only to find they've replaced the cereal aisle with a meditation pod and a gender-neutral bathroom? This is classic corporate doublespeak for "we're funneling your hard-earned grocery money into woke initiatives."

And don't even get me started on the locations they're targeting. Texas? Georgia? Kentucky? Coincidence? I think not. These are red states, people. The deep state is clearly testing the waters to see how much they can disrupt our supply chains before the 2026 midterms. First, they came for our gas stoves. Now, they're coming for our Kroger-brand frozen pizzas. What's next? Will they force us to buy lab-grown meat from Bill Gates' backyard?

But here's the real kicker: Kroger says they'll "offer roles in other stores" to employees. Sure, Jan. Next thing you know, these poor cashiers will be reassigned to a dystopian Amazon warehouse where they're microchipped and forced to recite DEI mantras before their 15-minute bathroom break. It's all part of the plan, folks—break the spirit of the American worker, one store closure at a time.

And let's talk about the timing. Sixty stores closing over the next 18 months? That's suspiciously close to the next election cycle. Mark my words: this is a soft launch for the Great Grocery Purge of 2026. They'll blame "supply chain issues" or "inflation," but we know the truth. This is about control. They want you hungry, confused, and dependent on government-approved rations. Well, I won't stand for it. I'm stockpiling canned beans and ammo as we speak.

So next time you walk into a Kroger and see a "Store Closing" sign, don't just shrug and head to Walmart. Ask yourself: who stands to benefit from this? Follow the money. Follow the tofu. And most importantly, stay vigilant. The grocery apocalypse is coming, and only the prepared will survive. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go bury my emergency stash of Kroger-brand beef jerky in the backyard. You can never be too careful.