Austin’s July Weather: A Saharan Dust Spa Treatment You Didn’t Ask For

Oh, joy. Another day in Austin where the weather gods have decided to bless us with their favorite combo: Sahara dust, humidity that could drown a cactus, and heat that makes you question every life decision that led you here. But hey, at least the sunsets are ~vibrant~—because nothing says "picturesque" like coughing up a lung while admiring the sky.

June was drier than a hipster’s humor, with rainfall levels so low even the cacti were filing for drought relief. And now, as we roll into July, we’re greeted with the subtle embrace of a subtropical high—which is just a fancy way of saying, "You will sweat. A lot." The heat index is flirting with triple digits, but don’t worry, it’s fine, because nothing says "patriotic celebration" like feeling like a rotisserie chicken at the Fourth of July fireworks.

And let’s not forget our special guest: Sahara dust. Because why should Austin have local problems when we can import them from 6,000 miles away? Sure, it’s great for suppressing hurricanes (cool, cool), but it’s also great for suppressing your ability to breathe. Allergies? Asthma? Just a general disdain for inhaling sand? Too bad. The dust is here, and it’s committed to ruining your sinuses until midweek.

But hey, if you’re heading to the coast for the holiday, good news: the haze is coming with you! Because nothing says "beach vacation" like squinting through a gritty, orange fog while your sunscreen mixes with dust to form a new kind of exfoliant.

So grab your water bottles, your antihistamines, and your sense of humor—because if you’re not laughing, you’re probably passed out from heatstroke. Happy Fourth, y’all. Stay crispy.