Two Homicides in One Night? Austin’s Deep State Is Clearly Up to Something

In a shocking turn of events that the mainstream media will undoubtedly blame on 'mental health' or 'economic anxiety,' Austin has once again descended into chaos under the watch of our tofu-pushing, bike lane-obsessed city council. Two homicides in one night? Coincidence? I think not. This is clearly the result of the radical left’s war on law and order, and I, for one, am not buying the official narrative.

First, we have the tragic stabbing of 72-year-old Ronald Mixon by his roommate, Robert Saldana. Now, the so-called 'authorities' want you to believe this was just a random act of violence between two men who shared a living space. But ask yourself: Why was Saldana found at a bus stop with 'lacerations'? Was he trying to escape the clutches of the deep state operatives who framed him? And why was Mixon’s 911 call about racial slurs and death threats ignored until it was too late? This reeks of a cover-up, folks. Maybe Mixon knew too much. Maybe he was about to expose the city’s secret plan to replace all our beloved barbecue joints with vegan smoothie bars. We may never know—because the truth is buried under layers of bureaucratic nonsense.

Then, just five hours later, another 'homicide' in a South Lamar parking lot. A pedestrian 'hit by a car.' But the police insist it wasn’t an accident. Of course it wasn’t! This is Austin, where the streets are overrun with rogue scooters, anarchist cyclists, and now, apparently, homicidal drivers. But mark my words—this is all part of the grand plan to justify more surveillance, more traffic cameras, and eventually, a full-blown police state where they’ll confiscate our guns and force us to ride unicycles to work.

And let’s talk about the timing. Two homicides in one night? That’s not an 'isolated incident,' no matter what Officer Lewis claims. This is a coordinated attack on our city’s morale, designed to distract us from the real issues—like the fact that our mayor probably drinks almond milk. Wake up, people! The elites want you scared, confused, and most importantly, docile. They don’t want you asking why these crimes keep happening under their watch. They just want you to call their tipline and trust that they’ll 'bring justice.' Spoiler alert: They won’t.

So stay vigilant, stock up on ammo, and for the love of all that’s holy, keep an eye on your roommates. The deep state is coming for us all—one stabbing and hit-and-run at a time.