WET AND WILD: Government Floods Texas in Latest Bid to Destroy Freedom (And Your Truck)

Oh, sure, the so-called 'experts' want you to believe that Texas is drowning under 'severe storms' and 'flash flooding.' But I’ve done my research, folks, and let me tell you—this is just another deep-state weather manipulation scheme to justify their tyrannical road closures! You think it’s a coincidence that the Guadalupe River 'mysteriously' surged to 30 feet right near Camp Mystic? Wake up, sheeple! That’s not rain—that’s the globalist elites testing their HAARP machines to see how fast they can turn Texas into a giant swimming pool for their pet dolphins.

And don’t even get me started on these 'flash flood warnings.' A 'warning' means they’re coming for your trucks, your guns, and your right to drive through three feet of water like a real Texan. The National Weather Service? More like the National Water Service, am I right? They’re just a front for Big Umbrella, trying to sell you more rain gear while they flood your streets to distract you from the fact that Austin’s city council is still pushing their vegan agenda.

Meanwhile, where’s the mainstream media coverage on the REAL issue? The fact that these 'flood deaths' are just a smokescreen to cover up the government’s secret underground bunker expansions. You think those missing girls at Camp Mystic just 'washed away'? No, no, no—they were recruited into the elite’s child army, trained in the art of tofu-based warfare.

So next time some bureaucrat tells you to 'avoid flooded roads,' I say grab your lifted F-350 and plow through that water like the patriot you are. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself… and maybe the deep state’s aquatic mind-control rays. Stay vigilant, my friends. The truth is out there—if you’re brave enough to wade through the lies.

This article was fact-checked by my gut instinct and a YouTube algorithm.