EXPOSED: The 'Dog Days of Summer' Are a Deep State Plot to Melt Your Brain

Ah, the so-called 'dog days of summer'—another thinly veiled attempt by the mainstream media to distract us from the real issues. You see, they want you to believe it’s just about heat and stars and ancient civilizations. But I’ve done my research (i.e., scrolling through obscure forums at 3 AM), and let me tell you, this is all part of the globalist agenda to melt our brains into submission.

First off, they claim these 'dog days' are from July 3 to August 11. Coincidence? I think not. That’s exactly when the Deep State schedules their annual 'Let’s Make Texans Miserable' conference. And don’t even get me started on Sirius, the 'dog star.' Oh sure, they say it’s just a bright star in the sky, but have you ever seen a star that bright? Exactly. It’s probably a government satellite beaming mind-control waves disguised as 'sunlight.' Wake up, sheeple!

And let’s talk about the ancient Egyptians. They supposedly used Sirius to predict Nile floods. But what they don’t tell you is that the same elites who built the pyramids are the same ones now controlling the weather with HAARP. Why else would Texas suddenly turn into a convection oven every summer? It’s not 'climate change'—it’s climate control.

But the most sinister part? The 'pet safety' tips. Oh, how convenient that they’re telling us to keep our dogs hydrated and out of hot cars. You know what that’s really about? Conditioning us to accept mandatory pet wellness checks by Big Government. Next thing you know, they’ll be taxing us for every panting pup caught outside without a cooling vest.

So while the media wants you to believe in 'science' and 'history,' I’ll be over here stockpiling ice and tin foil—because if there’s one thing I know, it’s that the truth is always hotter than a Texas summer. Stay vigilant, folks. And for the love of liberty, keep your pets away from the chemtrails.