GOVERNMENT RAIN SCAM: How 'Flash Floods' Are Just Another Excuse to Control Your Mind (and Your BBQ)

Oh, sure, the so-called 'heavy rains' are back again, folks. Just like clockwork, right after the last 'flooding crisis' conveniently distracted us from the real issues. Coincidence? I think not. The Hill Country is drowning—not just in water, but in deep-state-engineered weather manipulation! Wake up, sheeple!

First, they tell us it's 'natural rainfall.' Then, they roll out the 'evacuation orders' like it's some kind of humanitarian effort. But let me ask you this: Why is Governor Abbott suddenly so concerned about saving lives when he’s been silent about the REAL crisis—the tofu-based agenda infiltrating our barbecue joints? Suspicious, isn’t it?

And don’t even get me started on the 'National Weather Service.' You mean the same people who can’t predict if it’ll rain on my barbecue but suddenly have precise flood-stage measurements? Please. This is all part of the grand plan to herd Texans into FEMA camps disguised as 'evacuation centers.' Mark my words, next they’ll be handing out vegan jerky and fluoride-laced water.

Meanwhile, Kerrville’s 'flash floods' conveniently wipe out evidence of last week’s 'missing persons.' How convenient that the searches are 'suspended' right when the waters rise again. Almost like someone doesn’t want us asking questions about those 161 'unaccounted for' souls. Follow the money—or in this case, the suspiciously well-timed rainwater!

And let’s talk about the Guadalupe River 'rising faster than July 4.' Oh, really? Or is it just another excuse to blame 'nature' for the government’s secret underground geoengineering projects? I’ve seen the blueprints, people. They’re pumping chemtrail runoff straight into our watersheds to soften us up for the Great Taco Truck Takeover. Open your eyes!

So next time you see a 'low-water crossing' closed, ask yourself: Who benefits? Not the hardworking Texans stranded by this 'natural disaster'—no, it’s Big Umbrella, Big Canoe, and their puppet masters in the radical rainmaking cabal. Stay vigilant, stock up on beef jerky, and for the love of liberty, don’t trust a single weather report. The truth is out there… and it’s probably floating down the Guadalupe right now.