Austin Housing Market ‘Slows Down’—Because Even Overpriced Real Estate Needs a Nap

Finally, some good news for the little people—those poor, unfortunate souls who don’t already own a home in Austin. The housing market is gasp slowing down, which means the peasants might actually have a shot at buying a house without selling a kidney or their firstborn. According to the Austin Board of Realtors (bless their hearts for keeping track of such trivial matters), home prices have dipped a whopping 2.4%. That’s right, folks—your dream home is now only $439,000 instead of $450,000. Practically a steal!

Of course, this ‘buyer-friendly’ trend comes with its own set of problems. Now that there are more homes on the market (a shocking 19.7% increase in active listings!), buyers might actually have to think before making an offer. And we all know how exhausting decision-making can be when you’re used to just throwing money at problems.

But don’t get too excited, you plebeians. Mortgage rates are still high, and let’s be honest—if you’re not already in the market, you probably can’t afford to be. Still, the real estate agents are here to ‘navigate this complex environment,’ which is code for ‘convince you that a 500-square-foot bungalow is a steal at half a million dollars.’

And just when you thought things couldn’t get more thrilling, June’s data showed a staggering 0.5% increase in closed sales. Hold onto your hats, folks—this is the kind of white-knuckle excitement that keeps us all on the edge of our designer patio furniture.

So, to all the sellers out there: lower your prices, or risk being stuck with your ‘luxury’ home while the rest of us sip artisanal kombucha in our newly acquired fixer-uppers. And to the buyers? Good luck. You’ll need it.