Pluckers’ 30th Anniversary: A Triumph of Capitalism (and Ranch Dressing)

In a stunning display of corporate benevolence, Pluckers Wing Bar—Austin’s last bastion of "independent" wing slinging—has announced a groundbreaking strategy to celebrate its 30th anniversary: selling food and alcohol at prices that won’t require a second mortgage. That’s right, folks. For one whole day (and then again later, because why not?), you can enjoy the revolutionary concept of $1 wings and $2 beers. Truly, the free market has blessed us.

Co-founder Sean Greenberg, a man who clearly understands the plight of the common Austinite, reminisced about the good old days when wings were just wings, and not a speculative asset traded on the NASDAQ. "We just wanted to serve great wings and create a place where people could hang out and have fun," Greenberg said, presumably while wiping away a single, grease-laden tear.

Meanwhile, Pluckers’ expansion plans read like a dystopian novel where every Texas town is forcibly assimilated into the Wing Collective. With ambitions to double its footprint in the next four years, soon you won’t be able to throw a bone-in, extra-crispy drumette without hitting a Pluckers. And let’s not forget their crowning achievement: being named one of the Best Places to Work by the Austin Business Journal. Because nothing says "employee satisfaction" like a lifetime supply of ranch dressing and the existential dread of the lunch rush.

So raise your $2 beer, Austin. Here’s to 30 more years of pretending this isn’t just another chain—but with marginally better queso.