City Council’s FAA Plea: A Covert Plot or Just More Government Nonsense?

Oh, sure, the Austin City Council is totally concerned about "safety" at the airport. That’s why they’re begging the FAA to hire more air traffic controllers—because nothing says "local government priorities" like meddling in federal aviation staffing. Wake up, sheeple! This isn’t about safety—it’s about CONTROL. Literally. Air traffic control. But also, control control.

Let’s break this down. The council claims they need 60 controllers but only have 29. Sounds dire, right? Wrong. This is just another ploy by the deep state to funnel more taxpayer money into their shadowy aviation-industrial complex. Why else would they suddenly care about planes not crashing? Maybe because they’ve got a secret underground bunker under ABIA, and they don’t want any pesky Cessnas accidentally exposing their lizard-person landing strip.

And don’t even get me started on their "partnership" with Austin Community College. Oh, how convenient—train up a fresh batch of brainwashed air traffic controllers right here in town! Next thing you know, they’ll be indoctrinating these kids to redirect flights away from BBQ joints and toward vegan smoothie bars. Mark my words, this is how they’ll enforce the Great Tofu Takeover.

But here’s the real kicker: the FAA is "moving too slowly" for Congressman Doggett. Oh, boo-hoo. Maybe if the feds weren’t too busy tracking our every move with 5G chemtrails, they’d have time to staff an airport properly. Or maybe—just maybe—this whole "shortage" is a smokescreen to justify more government overreach. Next, they’ll be demanding we all wear transponder collars "for safety."

So buckle up, Austin. Your city council isn’t here to protect you from midair collisions—they’re here to steer you straight into the clutches of the New World Order. And if you think those "near-misses" are accidents, I’ve got a tinfoil hat with your name on it.

This has been your daily dose of truth. Stay vigilant. Stay paranoid. And for the love of liberty, keep your eyes on the skies.