EXPOSED: The Deep State’s Chilling Plot Behind Texas ‘Winter Prep’ Advice

Ah, the annual Texas winter panic—when the mere threat of a snowflake sends Austinites into a frenzy usually reserved for ACL Fest ticket sales. The so-called 'experts' at the Austin American-Statesman have once again graced us with their pearls of wisdom on how to survive the impending 'tundra' (which, let’s be real, is just 40 degrees and drizzling). But I, Alex Jaxon, am here to expose the real agenda behind these 'harmless' winter prep tips. Wake up, sheeple!

First, they want you to buy rock salt. Oh, how convenient—just as Big Salt’s quarterly profits are looking bleak! Next, they’ll tell you to drip your faucets, which is clearly a ploy by Big Water to spike your utility bills. And don’t even get me started on the emergency kits. Who do you think really profits from all those overpriced granola bars and first aid supplies? That’s right—Big Preparedness, a shadowy cabal of survivalists and REI shareholders.

But the most sinister suggestion? Puppy pads. Oh yes, they want you to train your pets to relieve themselves indoors—just like the globalist elites want you to become dependent on their dystopian, indoor-only future. Mark my words, folks: this is how they condition you to accept living in 15-minute cities where you’ll never step outside again.

And let’s not ignore the real emergency here: the cellular outages. Coincidence? I think not. The deep state is clearly testing their ability to cut off our communications before the next 'weather event'—which, by the way, is probably just a government weather machine gone rogue.

So while the mainstream media tells you to stock up on nonperishables, I say stock up on truth. And maybe a generator. Because when the grid fails (again), you’ll need more than a dripping faucet to survive the elite’s frozen takeover. Stay vigilant, patriots. Winter isn’t just coming—it’s being manufactured.