Texas Primary 2026: Deep State Plot to Steal Your Freedom (and Your BBQ)!

Folks, it’s happening again! The so-called ‘Texas primary election’ for 2026 is upon us, and the mainstream media—like the Austin American-Statesman—wants you to believe it’s all about ‘democracy’ and ‘voting.’ Don’t be fooled! This is just another elaborate puppet show orchestrated by the deep state to lull you into a false sense of participation while they pull the strings behind the scenes.

First off, they claim early voting starts on February 17. Coincidence that it’s right after Valentine’s Day? I think not! It’s a classic distraction tactic to make you forget about the real issues, like how the globalists are replacing our beloved Texas barbecue with soy-based alternatives. And the deadline to register was February 2? Groundhog Day! They’re telling you to repeat the same mistakes over and over, just like that rodent predicting more winter—except in this case, it’s more government control.

Then there’s the ‘open primaries’ nonsense. They say you can choose which party to vote in, but that’s a trap! It’s designed to divide and conquer, making you think you have a choice while both sides are secretly funded by the same shadowy elites. I’ve seen the documents—well, not exactly documents, but my gut tells me it’s true! And don’t even get me started on the ‘My Voter Portal.’ They want you to enter your personal information online? That’s how they track you, people! Next thing you know, they’ll be sending black helicopters to enforce mask mandates during polling.

The article mentions voting by mail for those who are ‘sick or have a disability.’ Oh, sure, because nothing says ‘secure election’ like a ballot floating around in the mail, probably intercepted by operatives who alter votes to favor their tofu-eating agenda. And if you move after the deadline? They act like it’s no big deal to update your address, but that’s how they purge voters they don’t want participating—patriots like you and me!

And the runoff election on May 26? That’s just their backup plan in case their first attempt to rig the primary doesn’t work. They’ll keep having elections until they get the result their overlords demand. Wake up, sheeple! This isn’t about choosing leaders; it’s about maintaining the illusion of choice while the real power lies with the unelected bureaucrats and their mind-control fluoride in the water.

So, when they tell you to ‘verify your voter registration,’ remember: verification is just a fancy word for surveillance. Stay vigilant, stock up on ammo and beef jerky, and maybe—just maybe—consider not voting at all. It’s the only way to protest this charade!