Wolf Ranch: Because Gentrifying the Wilderness is So In Right Now

Oh, joyous news! The 1,120-acre wolf slaughterhouse—ahem, sorry, "master-planned subdivision"—in Georgetown is entering its final phase. Because who needs open spaces and wildlife when you can have McMansions, amirite?

With the land now prepped and sterilized of any remnant of nature, builders are raring to construct nearly 700 homes in West Bend, the cherry on top of this concrete sundae. But wait, there's more! This is in addition to the 1,792 lots already plopped into Hilltop and Southfork. Isn't progress wonderful?

"More than 1,200 people currently call Wolf Ranch home."

Yes, because nothing says "home" like living in a sprawling monument to suburban blandness, smack dab in the middle of one of the nation's fastest-growing carbon footprints.

Move-in-ready homes will be ready for the gentrifiers next summer, with prices ranging from a mere "mid-$400,000s" to over $1 million. What a steal!

By 2028, Wolf Ranch will boast 2,465 homes, ensuring that every last blade of grass is doing its part for the economy. Thanks, Hillwood Communities—the real estate arm of Ross Perot Jr.'s empire—for turning a buck at Mother Nature's expense.

But hey, at least they're throwing in some "green spaces" (read: not actually green) like a neighborhood park and sports field. And don't forget the pièce de résistance—parts of the Georgetown Regional Trail system will extend through West Bend, so you can enjoy a sliver of nature while jogging off your suburban angst.

Homebuilders including Coventry Homes, David Weekley Homes, and other purveyors of cookie-cutterdom are standing by to help you live the (wet) dream.

But don't take our word for it. The Home Builders Association of Greater Austin dubbed Wolf Ranch the "best master-planned community" of 2024. Because nothing screams "best" like razing the wilderness for profit. 🌳 Writing the obituary for Mother Nature, one subdivision at a time. ⚰️