Dads, Don't Check Out When Your Kids Become Teenagers

Our oldest is turning 13 soon, and it's got me reflecting on the role of fathers in their children's adolescent years. Many dads feel lost and ill-equipped as their kids enter this new stage, likening it to uncharted territory. But that's a load of bull.

"Roads? Where we’re going we don’t need roads.”

— Doc Brown, Back to the Future II

Most dads have already navigated this road—they were once teenagers themselves and had their own parents to guide (or misguide) them. That experience, whether positive or cautionary, is a map that shouldn't be ignored.

Famed Gulag survivor and Soviet dissident Alexander Solzhenitsyn warned that "[a]dults deferring to the opinion of their children... [is] a certain retreat by the older generation, yielding their intellectual leadership to the younger generation."

Today, this "abdication of responsibility" is prevalent, with fathers often deferring to their kids' opinions and social mediainfluences (TikTok, anyone?).

Dads, we need to step up. Parenting teenagers is challenging, but we can't shirk our duties and outsource our kids' development to the government or the internet. We've been there before, and we know the way—roads or no roads, we're not just along for the ride.

Caleb Harris

Harris and his wife live in Pflugerville with their seven children. Comments/suggestions: thoughtsforcaleb@gmail.com