Cringe Couch Conservatism: Debunking Ohio's Far Right.

JD Vance: The Far-Right's Golden Boy or Just Another Republican Clown?

American voters, it's time to wake up and smell the coffee (or in JD Vance's case, the Diet Mountain Dew). The far-right has a new golden boy, and he's been busy crisscrossing the country, spewing his hateful rhetoric. JD Vance, the Ohio senator and Republican vice-presidential nominee, has been at the center of countless rumors, memes, and jokes since joining the Trump ticket. From sexual antics to suspicious online activity, here's what we know about the man who could be a heartbeat away from the presidency:

The "Couch-gate" Scandal:

• A now-deleted post on X by a left-leaning account claimed Vance described a sexual act with couch cushions in his memoir, "Hillbilly Elegy." This fake claim spread like wildfire, even making it to late-night TV. The originator admitted it was a joke, but it sparked fact-checks by Snopes and AP.
• URL: https://x.com/rickrudescalves
• https://www.businessinsider.com/jd-vance-couch-sex-joke-author-speaks-2024-7

Dolphin Business:

• Vance shared a post about a woman "violated by a dolphin," and the bolded words "woman" and "dolphin" suggested he searched for these terms. X users called him out, with comments like "I dread to think what the rest of your search history looks like, dude."
• The senator has not responded, but this raises questions about his online behavior.

Venmo Connections:

• Wired reported on Vance's Venmo friends list, which included Amalia Halikias of the Heritage Foundation and Trump critic Jeff Flake. Conservatives from Hoover Institution, AOL executives, and Tucker Carlson were also listed.
• URL: https://www.wired.com/story/jd-vance-venmo/
• https://www.linkedin.com/in/amalia-halikias-11b00457

The Eyeliner Effect:

• TikTok and social media users have noted Vance's prominent eyes and dark eyelashes, sparking speculation about eyeliner use. Old photos, including his Marine Corps picture, show naturally dark eyelashes.

Mountain Dew Madness:

• Vance claimed that Democrats will call drinking Diet Mountain Dew racist, prompting responses from Kentuckians and even the state's governor, Andy Beshear.

Stay woke, folks. The truth is often stranger than fiction, and in this case, it's downright absurd.