"Muggles in Austin, Get Your Wallets Out: Capitalism Just Found a New Forbidden Forest to Exploit!"

Attention, Muggles of Austin! Better brush up on your Wingardium Leviosa and hunt down those dusty spell books, because capitalism has finally brought the Harry Potter magic to your doorstep.

Warner Bros. Discovery Global Themed Entertainment and Fever (because two corporations are better than one) present: "Harry Potter: A Forbidden Forest Experience." McKinney Roughs Nature Park will be transformed into an illuminated trail of consumerist delight starting November 9th.

Prepare to be immersed (and by immersed, we mean surrounded by people willing to drop cash on nostalgia) in iconic forest scenes from the Harry Potter and Fantastic Beasts films. Unicorns, Nifflers, Hippogriffs, and more capitalist critters await! You too can cast spells to light up the forest and even summon a Patronus, which is perfect for that Instagram story.

But wait, there's more! This "experience" comes with a themed village where you can buy overpriced food and drinks, and a retail shop because who doesn't need more Harry Potter merch?

How to part with your money for "Harry Potter: A Forbidden Forest Experience" in Austin

Tickets go on sale at 10 a.m. on August 29th. Adults can pay the low, low price of $41, while children's tickets are a steal at $28. Children ages 2 and under are free, because even capitalism has a tiny, shriveled heart. Sign up for the waitlist to be the first to secure your spot in this magical money pit.

The experience runs daily from 5:45 to 11:45 p.m., with the last entry at 10:15 p.m. The trail takes about 45 to 75 minutes to complete, with the total duration between 60 and 90 minutes — plenty of time to reflect on your consumerist choices.