news

Williamson County: "Oh Look, We're Twins with South Korea—Both Got Samsung's Sweatshops!"

Oh fabulous, just what we need! Williamson County is so desperate for "ideas," they've signed up for a sister-city partnership with Yongin, South Korea. Because, you know, sharing is caring when you've both got Samsung factories. Maybe they'll trade tips on how to exploit workers and whittle down wages. Progress!

Published October 8, 2024 at 7:01am by Claire Osborn

Breaking: Capitalist Fantasy Unfolds as Williamson County and Yongin City Kiss and Make Up

Oh, the joy! The sheer, capitalist-driven joy! Williamson County and Yongin City in South Korea are officially BFFs now, all thanks to their mutual love for Samsung and its shiny factories. Officials couldn't contain their excitement as they announced this union made in corporate heaven.

So, what's the tea? According to the sacred news release from Williamson County, this agreement, blessed by the Commissioners Court on July 2, is not just about friendship bracelets. It’s about "stronger, friendly cooperation and mutual prosperity." Yawn.

County Judge Bill Gravell even jetted off to South Korea to sign the sister city agreement on Sept. 28, like a true champion of global capitalism.

"This partnership will open up many avenues for exchanging ideas between residents, businesses, and students," Gravell gushed in the release. "Imagine having Williamson County students participate in an exchange program with Yongin Special City, and students from Korea coming here. We can learn much from each other." Ideas? More like how to chase those dollars!

Oh, and let's not forget, "Special" cities in South Korea have a population of 1 million or more. Because, you know, size really does matter when you're playing this big business game.

The South Korean government has crowned Yongin City as the "Next Generation Semiconductor hub," with investments of over $460 billion by the government, Samsung Electronics, and SK Hynix. Because why put that money into healthcare or education, right?

Mayor Lee Sang-il of Yongin Special City will grace Williamson County with his presence in January for a "special" visit. I bet the red carpet is already rolled out.

Ever since Samsung announced its shiny new semiconductor manufacturing facility in Taylor, Williamson County has become a hotspot for South Korean companies. They now boast a whopping seven Korean businesses. Wow, seven! Someone give them a medal.

Members of the Williamson County Economic Development Partnership tagged along with Gravell to South Korea, schmoozing with 36 companies and governmental agencies, including the U.S. Embassy in Seoul. The result? Thirteen "solid leads" on companies interested in locating in Williamson County. And probably a ton of free lunches.

"The Williamson County EDP has forged a strong connection between the county and South Korean businesses," Dave Porter, executive director of the Williamson County Economic Development Partnership, enthused. "We have an office in Seoul to assist Korean businesses with getting information on how to expand in Williamson County, Texas. This brings good paying jobs to the county." Good paying jobs? Or just more oligarchs buying their way into heaven?

But hey, who am I to judge? Let's just bask in the glory of this capitalist union and wait for those exchange programs to fill up with future corporate drones. 🤑✨