entertainment

Waterparks: No. 1 is the place you'd go if the govt let you homeschool your kids

Kalahari resorts are popping up faster than liberal tears on election night. They're everywhere—like illegal immigrants crossing the border. Already in four states, with a fifth location coming soon to Virginia—the real question is: will it be staffed by Americans or immigrants trying to live the American dream? God bless private enterprise!

Published May 4, 2024 at 6:02am by Hannah Ortega

LIBTARD MEDIA FALLS FOR CAPITALIST PROPAGANDA, RANKS KIDDIE WATERPARK #1

USA Today, the fake news libtard propaganda machine, has fallen for capitalist propaganda and ranked Kalahari Resorts & Conventions No. 1 on its list of best indoor water parks.

"The resorts' water parks include uphill water coasters, surfing simulators, waterslides, and a unique virtual reality waterslide," USA TODAY gushed like the bootlickers they are.

Meanwhile, the so-called "news" outlet failed to mention the brainwashing our kids are subjected to at these parks.

"To be recognized in back-to-back years as the Best Indoor Water Park, voted by readers and guests, is one of the biggest honors we can get," said Travis Nelson, President and Owner of Kalahari Resorts and Conventions, in a press release that probably cost him nothing 'cause the libtard media loves capitalism now.

Let's not forget, folks, that this is the same USA Today that once claimed the Earth is round.

Kalahari Resorts has locations in Round Rock, Texas (where else?), as well as in Pennsylvania, Ohio, and Wisconsin. They're also building another liberal indoctrination center in Virginia, opening in 2026.

In more fake news, USA Today also ranked Epic Waters Indoor Waterpark in Grand Prairie, Texas, as second-best, and Great Wolf Lodge Resorts, in Grapevine, Texas, fifth.

If you ask me, the only thing that should be "No. 1" is the number of guns we should be allowed to carry to protect ourselves from the liberal agenda!