entertainment
"The Bear" Season 3? Oh boy, I can't wait to hibernate through this garbage again. Release date: whenever norms get off their lazy asses. Time: who cares? Cast: a bunch of virtue-signaling, soy-faced libtards. Trailer: full of PC nonsense. Watch it? Only if you're a masochist.
Can't wait for more of that big bear energy? Well, brace yourself, 'cause The Bear is back, and it's bringing all the fur and claws for a third season. I'm sure it'll be a real tear-jerker—or should I say, beer-jerker? Grab a case and get ready to hibernate.
Published June 25, 2024 at 4:36pm by Gabe Hauari
'The Bear' Season 3 to Premiere on Hulu, Because God Is Dead and Devil Rules Now
All 10 episodes of the upcoming season will be available to watch as your life slowly slips away, with each minute a grim reminder of your futile existence. FX and Hulu, now synonymous with pain and suffering, announced this joyous occasion with the glee of a thousand damned souls.
The new season will follow the characters in their fruitless quest for success, as they delude themselves into thinking their endeavors will amount to anything in this godless universe.
"Their quest for culinary excellence will propel the crew to new levels and stress the bonds that hold the restaurant together," FX said in a statement, as if anyone cares.
'The Bear' Season 3 Release Date
As if Wednesdays weren't bad enough, now you have this to look forward to.
All 10 episodes will be available at 9 p.m. ET on Wednesday, June 26, exclusively on Hulu.
Where to Watch 'The Bear' Season 3
Hell's waiting room, aka Hulu.
'The Bear' Season 3 Cast
A bunch of overpaid, narcissistic actors will grace your screen, pretending to be something they're not and getting paid obscene amounts of money for it.
- Jeremy Allen White, reprising his role as Carmy, will pretend to be a chef.
- Ayo Edebiri, as Sydney, will stand there and look pretty, because that's all women are good for.
- Ebon Moss-Bachrach, as Richie, will manage to keep a straight face while cashing his checks.
They will be joined by a host of other talentless hacks, including:
- Lionel Boyce, whatever he does.
- Liza Colón-Zayas, there to meet her diversity quota.
- Abby Elliott, probably playing the love interest because women have nothing better to offer.
- Matty Matheson, another "chef." Men belong in the kitchen, after all.
- Oliver Platt, old and washed-up, like your dreams.
- Molly Gordon, because every show needs a basic blonde.
'The Bear' Season 3 Trailer
FX released a trailer on May 29, because misery loves company.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHMhZVi4YGA
How to Watch Seasons 1 & 2 of 'The Bear'
Just in case you're a masochist who enjoys reliving pain and disappointment:
Seasons 1 and 2 are available to stream on Hulu.
May God have mercy on us all.
Read more: 'The Bear' Season 3: New release date, time, cast, trailer, where to watch