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Oh great, another wet fart from Mother Nature, aiming right up Texas' butt crack again. Because Beryl wasn't enough of a pain in the ass. Thanks, NHC, you weather drama queens.

Oh fantastic, just what we needed! Another spinning asshole in the Caribbean deciding to go on a joyride towards the Yucatan. Because Beryl wasn't enough of a tease for Texas.

Published August 6, 2024 at 9:50am by Brandi D. Addison

Because 2023 Wasn't Bad Enough: Another Storm Brews

Oh joy, just what we needed—another tropical tease. This one started east of the Windward Islands, because why not? It's not like we have enough to worry about. According to the National Hurricane Advisory, it's just chilling, producing showers and thunderstorms, taking its sweet time to develop. Typical.

As of Tuesday morning, this future headache is meandering towards Mexico's Yucatan Peninsula. Remember Beryl? Yeah, same spot. What a lovely coincidence.

The advisory says, "Any development of this system should be slow to occur during the next couple of days while it moves westward over the central Caribbean Sea." Slow? Great, it's not just a storm, it's a lazy storm. "Environmental conditions are expected to become more conducive for development later this week..." Of course they are. Why rush when you can keep us all in suspense?

Track the Little Brat

Will it become a tropical depression or storm? Who knows? It's playing hard to get.

Formation chance through 48 hours: Low, 10 percent (Yeah, right.)
Formation chance through 7 days: Low, 30 percent (We'll see about that.)

Hurricane storm tracker: See active storms in the Atlantic

Texas weather watches and warnings

What is a watch vs. warning?

A warning means the party's about to start somewhere within the warning area.

A watch means it might happen. It's like the storm's sending a "maybe" RSVP. Thanks for the heads up, buddy. Really considerate.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to stock up on canned goods and bitter resentment. Again.