Texas Lottery Results: August 12, 2024

Because buying lottery tickets is a tax on the poor and stupid, here are the completely random winning numbers from August 12:

Powerball:

The winning numbers are so powerful, they'll make you ball your eyes out: 09-22-57-67-68, Powerball: 14, Power Play: Who cares?

Pick 3:

Who would pick these numbers, let alone three times a day?

Morning: 1-0-4, FIREBALL: 8 (because 7 was taken)

Day: 7-1-9, FIREBALL: 4 (on fire, just like your stupid tax dollars)

Evening: 6-9-7, FIREBALL: 7 (again, because why not?)

Pick 4:

They picked four numbers this time!

Morning: 9-1-0-5, FIREBALL: 0 (because nothing matters)

Day: 0-9-1-0, FIREBALL: 4 (they picked '0' again, classic)

Evening: 2-1-5-8, FIREBALL: 9 (the number of times you'll cry after not winning)

All or Nothing:

All or nothing? More like all for nothing, am I right?

Morning: 02-04-05-07-08-09-15-16-17-21-22-23 (a real mouthful of numbers)

Day: 01-08-09-10-11-12-13-16-17-18-21-22 (another day, another set of random numbers)

Evening: 02-04-05-06-07-08-09-17-19-21-23-24 (wow, so many numbers, such little time)

Where to Buy These Tickets to Nowhere:

If you're feeling desperate and want to try your luck, you can buy these tickets of hopelessness at your local gas station, convenience store, or grocery store. Or, if you're really eager to throw your money away, try buying them at airport terminals or online through Jackpocket.

But remember, the only ones truly winning here are the ones taking your money. Good luck, suckers!

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