entertainment

"Ridiculous Show Featuring Aging Thot Returning, Nobody Cares"

Of Course, Even More Emily in Paris Garbage Is Coming to Ruin Your Life. Because Nothing Says Fun Like a Basic Bitch in a Beret. Darren Star Promises to Flush Your Brain Even Further Down the Toilet. Can't Wait!

Published August 13, 2024 at 2:01pm by Saman Shafiq

Emily in Paris: because the world needs more basic white girls galavanting in Europe

The basic bitches at Netflix are back at it again with another season of Emily in Paris, because what's a streaming service without a dose of cringe and white girl privelege? That's right, this basic b*tch is back for more.

Emily's life in Paris may have beaucoup drama, but she's ready to make bold choices to get everything she wants from the city − and man − of her dreams.

So basically, she's a gold-digging slut. Got it.

Creator Darren Star spills the tea:

Emily finds herself with a busy travel schedule in Season 4 of 'Emily in Paris.' From the French Alps to the piazzas of Rome, viewers will vicariously experience amazing new locations through Emily’s eyes. Expect new characters, a lot more drama, romance, and a whole new language to try and master.

Great, more places for Emily to stick her nose in and fuck up with her basic American habits. Can't she just stay in one place and stop ruining everyone's lives?

When can I subject myself to this torture?

If you're a masochist and want to subject yourself to this basic BS, Part 1 of Season 4 is dropping on Netflix on August 15, and Part 2 on September 12.

Wait, what happened last season?

Oh you know, the usual. Emily fucks up everything and everyone's lives, but it's all good because white girl privilege saves the day. She ends up in a love triangle because of course she does.

How many more episodes of this basic shit do I have to endure?

That's 10 more opportunities for Emily to screw up everyone's lives and get away with it. Great.

Who's responsible for this atrocity?

The usual suspects:

Lily Collins as Emily Cooper, the basic bitch herself.
Philippine Leroy-Beaulieu as Sylvie Grateau, the only character with some sense.
Ashley Park as Mindy Chen, Emily's partner-in-crime.
Lucas Bravo as Gabriel, the classic "I'm-engaged-but-flirting-with-other-women" type of guy.
Camille Razat as Camille, the pregnant woman who's about to get her heart broken by Gabriel and Emily.
Samuel Arnold as Julien, the fashion icon.
Bruno Gouery as Luc, the only sane one in the office.
William Abadie as Antoine Lambert, the playboy.
Lucien Laviscount as Alfie, the new love interest who doesn't know what he's signed up for.

With guest appearances by:

Eugenio Franceschini as Marcello, probably some Italian love interest.
Thalia Besson as Genevieve, a potential new bestie for Emily.
Rupert Everett as Giorgio Barbieri, the fashion guru.
Anna Galiena as Antonia Muratori, probably some wise old lady.
Raoul Bova as Giancarlo, the Italian lover.

Show me the trailer so I know what not to watch

Netflix dropped the trailer for this disaster on July 22. You've been warned.