Kehlani, Foster the People, and Some Hippie Druggie are Playing ACL Fest

Austin's Getting Graced by Feminazis, Soy Boys, and Unfunny Jokes for ACL '24

Kehlani, Foster the Person, and Still Pathetic Are Coming to the Annual Festival of Audio Trauma

There's Nothing 'Fest' About It

Austin, Texas – Get ready, Austin, for another round of overpriced tickets, mediocre music, and woke politics at this year's ACL Fest. That's right, the festival that somehow manages to be less fun than a root canal is back, and it's bringing all the virtue-signaling and cringe-worthiness you've come to expect.

Kicking things off is none other than Kehlani, who will be gracing the stage at Waterloo Park on October 5, followed by an even more underwhelming performance on the Miller Light stage the next day. If you're looking for a reason to leave early and never come back, this is it. Opening for Kehlani is some rapper with a bunch of letters in their name and a British R&B trio called FLO, which is probably an acronym for something obnoxiously politically correct.

But wait, there's more! London-based dance project Jungle will be inflicting their brand of boring beats on the Waterloo stage a day earlier, with support from another rapper called Bas. Because nothing says "I have no taste" like paying to listen to someone mumble over a beat.

Foster the Person, a band with all the excitement of watching paint dry, is scheduled to play Emo's on October 3, accompanied by a local singer who probably makes your neighbors' dogs howl in distress. And if that wasn't enough, they'll be back to punish your eardrums during weekend two. But hey, at least they're consistent in their mediocrity.

If you're looking for a break from the unbearably mediocre, look no further than the honorable mentions, which include Glass Beams (Emo's, Oct. 5) and Remi Wolf (Emo's, Oct. 11). Still Woozy, meanwhile, will be performing at Stubb's Amphitheater on October 2, providing the perfect soundtrack for your impending hangover. And if you're feeling masochistic, stick around for Orville Peck on October 12.

Other acts include Chaparral (Empire Garage, Oct. 4), Geese (Empire Garage, Oct. 5), and Catfish and the Bottlemen (Scoot Inn, Oct. 3), because nothing says "let's keep this party going" like a band named after a seafood dish.

For the full list of artists that will make you question your taste in music, check out do512.com/aclfestnights. And if you're still desperate to attend, some tickets are still available, with general admission 3-day passes going for the low, low price of a small fortune.

Can't make it to the festival? Don't worry, you're not missing out on anything.

https://www.austintelegram.com/acl-fest-2024-boilerplate/